Chicken or the Egg
by Trim59
Summary: FINALLY COMPLETE Squinoa. Squall desperately tries to save Rinoa from her dark future...as Ultimecia. He has to cope and deal with that fact that everything that has taken place may not be entirely under his own control. R&R, PLEASE!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This prologue is from Squall's perspective…it will switch later in the story chapters

Chicken or the Egg

Prologue

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Most people do not give this more than a fleeting moments thought as they know there is no clear-cut answer and one conclusion obviously contradicts itself. Without the egg, there is no chicken. Without the chicken, there is no egg.

Squall had continually tried to shake odd feelings of déjà vu from his mind. Of course there were things about this sorceress before him that seemed…familiar. Regardless, there he was with his gunblade to his side, ready, as Ultimecia put her finishing touches on her speech.

_Okay I got it…you want to kill us…we want to kill you…can you just shut the hell up? _

Moments later, Squall's hopes were answered, as they engaged in combat with the evil sorceress. It was easy, too easy; no…all their training had just been paying off. From the moment each of them had stepped their foot into garden one of their main priorities was training to kill the sorceress. To defend every innocent of the world against the evil sorceress threat, even his sorceress…Rinoa…who stood no more that a few feet away since they arrived in time compression.

However, he couldn't help but to notice it seemed as she was fighting internally as well as externally, that she was holding back her true power. A strong evidence of this was the tear he noticed streaming down her rough face that he managed to pick out even during heated battle. Sure they were all exchanging blows but he knew her adrenaline was pumping way too much to cry over a flesh wound. One benefit of his quiet nature and overactive brain was he overanalyzed often. Usually this trait was bad but occasionally he would observe things that went unnoticed by others.

_What the fuck? …! Why are you holding back?_

Everyone, including Squall himself, noticed Squall slipping off into his own little world. They all found it hard to believe that he would do something the like now. Never before had he lost focus…at least not in battle.

"Squall…" Rinoa managed to squeak out, staring with questioning eyes as Zell dodged a Firaga hurled at high speed in his direction.

_Come on…focus_

Squall merely nodded in Rinoa's direction, assuring her everything was okay as he did his best impersonation of Barry Bonds, smashing the majority of a Blizzaga spell with his gunblade back in Ultimecia's direction.

Griever gave them a much more difficult time. Of course he would, Squall thought to himself, he was the strongest GF in the history of the world that Squall had imagined during his younger teen years at garden, the lonely ones. Once again, Squall had to fight his urges to over think everything and maintain his focus on the fight.

_Why does she have him? …How the fuck does she have him? Something is wrong…something is really wrong!_

"Squall! Focus! Ahh…" Irvine snapped Squall back to awareness as he used his rifle as a shield against Griever's claws.

"I…I'm sorry…let's just finish this guys," Squall hesitantly stated to the group, meeting eyes with Rinoa. They all nodded in agreement, only Rinoa facing him as the rest were engaged in battle.

_Ahhh hyne I'm tired…this is fucking ridiculous. Exchanging blows with what I thought was my friend…and people wander why I never fucking open up. _Squall managed to smirk at his attempt at humor even if to himself as he raised himself off the ground from one knee.

"Time to finish this bitch off Squall" Zell yelled from the opposite end of the rock they were now…floating on. Immediately, the true form of the sorceress within Ultimecia replied to this hurtful comment by landing a blow underneath Zell's sternum nearly knocking him off the rock.

"I couldn't agree more…I got this stupid bitch" Squall mustered through clenched teeth as he charged her glowing with a slightly golden aura.

_This ends now Ultimecia…you will not hurt the people I care for or the women I love…not again._

Squall sent the true form of the sorceress into an act of implosion after landing his Limit Break of Lion Heart, as he landed back on the rock with his friends. The next few moments were a blur, as the trembling in his body matched that of the world around him. As Squall stood over the lifeless body of Ultimecia, that the true form of the sorceress had rid itself of only moments before he couldn't believe what he saw as he faded away from the others into time compression.

-------------------------------------------

_Hyne, no! …How? …what happened to you Rin…what happened to your knight…to me?_

Many thoughts plagued Squall Lionheart's mind as he collapsed to the barren ground below him. Especially the visions that plagued his mind of what he saw hours before.

_That was my ring…that was griever…_

He remembered as he fought the feelings of tiredness fight against him, the information he had received on Ultimecia from Laguna. There wasn't much actually but there was a hypothesis on why she turned and let the evil inside of her take over…why she had fallen. Probably about 10 facts, 90 fiction, Squall thought to himself. However, he refused to deny it anymore as he realized the truth. Someway or another, Ultimecia's knight had betrayed her or failed her (which is the same as betraying her he thought to himself) letting her fall to the dark powers within. He had failed her, he had failed Rinoa…and on that fateful day in the past…or future…Rinoa died in a sense and Ultimecia was born.

_That was griever Rinoa…that was you too, huh? O hyne no this is all wrong!_

He knew from the classes on sorceresses he had taken in Garden about the extreme importance of a knight. They always loved one another, as they were the two most important people in each other lives. Sometimes there was romance, sometimes they were in love, sometimes they loved one another but were merely close friends. Regardless, the constant was the undeniable bond they shared that left they physically, emotionally, and mentally dependant on one another. The sorceress always was more dependent on the knight, as he was the only thing keeping her from giving into her dark powers. When and if a sorceress fail, it was almost mostly because of her knight failing or betraying her. Sometimes it would be willingly as the knight no longer wished to wish his life for her, or found someone else that he loved. Sometimes it would be unwillingly, such as dying protecting her in battle. Basically, if the sorceress lost her knight she lost her love and would usually lose her will to live and to fight off the evil within her.

_I failed you Rin…I'm so sorry. What did I do…die in battle for you or did I cheat on you …did I give up on you? No! _ Squall reprimanded himself for that statement. _I would never do that… I would never hurt you…I would give my life for you…ya I must have died in battle for you…but how…_

He couldn't stop the tears, as he had held them back for years and they refused to yield to him any longer, not that he any longer cared.

_Will I ever get to see your beautiful face again Rin? Will I ever get to hear your beautiful voice again? Will I ever get tell you how I feel? _

Squall's thoughts were momentarily interrupted by the waves of overwhelming tiredness running through his weakened form of a body. He knew that he was probably going to die in this place. He knew he probably was never going to see her again…as he slowly let the tiredness take over his body.

_Rin…I promise…I won't fail you again. No matter what I won't fail you. I won't let you fail…again I promise. I…love…you Rinoa…I love you_

Then he heard her voice.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: HEY! Thanks for reading…hopefully someone is reading this…I decided to put up the prologue and first chapter in the same night so you got at least a tiny feel for the story I don't know lol sorry…by the way I use a lot of teenage text and instant message talk so I'm sorry if I am confusing to you older viewers lol :D

Okay the story is actually starting now and I apologize for before o and btw I forgot I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING DOING WITH INCLUDING CHARACTERS OR ANY PART OF FINAL FANTASY THAT'S ALL SQUARE ENIX ROCK ON WITH YOUR BAD SELVES okay thanks enjoy

Once again I have do not own any of this stuff Square Enix does thanks

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 1

They had just had their first kiss, tender and short. However, Rinoa knew this was a huge step for Squall and regardless of it's innocence it made her feel loved. It managed to send chills down her entire body.

_This is …romantic…the place where we first met he actually kisses me…_

She had to hold back a slight laugh as to not startle the man that she gently had her head laying on his chest. She wanted to stay in this position and not move. She knew Squall would keep her safe, she hoped forever. The thought of Squall Leonheart being…gosh…romantic made her laugh inside. If you asked her if you thought that was possible weeks ago she would have thought you were on drugs for even thinking such crazy thoughts. He was changing though, little by little. It truly didn't matter to her as he was perfect to her…she saw the amazing person inside of him. It was just a wonderful feeling to have his exterior start to match his interior. She knew that she was beginning to not fear losing everyone that his emotional wounds were starting to head. Squall wasn't really changing, just becoming who he really was.

Squall couldn't hold back the Squall smirk playing across his face, not that she could see it. He was proud of himself to be honest. This was his first good attempt that succeeded in showing Rinoa how much he cared…how much he loved her. There was that time on the Ragnarok. He knew he opened up then though only because he was not sure if they were going to survive and make it back to Earth. He did it this time thought because he willingly wanted to. He wanted them to be as close as possible…physically and emotionally; he was not going to lose her.

She heard him try to say something, but the words got stuck in his throat like when Zell tried to eat ten hotdogs in thirty seconds. As she looked up to meet his eyes she was shocked at the determination and fear that laid within them.

"You okay?" She managed to speak out, wondering what was on his mind. "Ya…but something has been on my mind. I …uhh…I…" Damn, Squall cursed to himself. What he wanted to say was so much easier said in his head. He knew though that she was not a mind reader and she had to hear him to know how he felt.

_Just say it…_

Squall's actions caught Rinoa off guard. He really was changing. Not at an alarming rate, but at a noticeable one. This truly was a incredibly alarming rate for Squall though she knew.

"I like…when you're around…when you're in my life. I don't want you…to go anywhere."

He looked so pensive, as if vulnerable not physically but emotionally. She smiled assuring him and hoping he did not think she thought what he was saying was funny. This didn't happen…they both knew she was smiling out of joy.

"…And I know I am your knight and you're my sorceress and I know this sounds juvenile…" That word…she know what he was going to say…what he was going to ask. She could hide her excitement for the moment but not the tears. "But I also want you to be my girlfr-"

"Yes! Squall I would love to be your…girlfriend!" Rinoa exclaimed in joy, clapping her hands together jumping slightly off the ground.

Squall caught the tears in her eyes. "Are you okay?"

"I've never been better." She said as she brought her body against his wrapping her hands around his neck, rising up on her tippy toes, kissing him. This was much more passionate than their first kiss as she initiated it.

The feeling was new to Squall but there was not one ounce of his body that complained.

_I could get used to this…_

Selphie knew that she shouldn't. Well, at least the camcorder went dead. That way she wouldn't have to dead with angry Squall attacking the expensive piece of equipment with his Lion Heart gunblade upon finding out what exactly was on it.

They are so cute…they look like they are in love, Selphie thought to herself. She had been looking for an excuse to go out there and she finally had it. All the members of the Garden, and all the guests had taken their seats in anticipation for the speeches from Headmaster Cid and SeeD Commander Squall Leonhart.

As she got closer to the balcony, she realized they were not aware of her presence. She was also shocked at what she was going to have to…interrupt…to inform them.

"Hey…" Selphie said quietly.

Squall had jumped at the sound of her voice, as his entire face turned different facets of pink and red. As did Rinoa's who almost instinctively hid her head against Squall's chest once again, to hide her slight embarrassment. To her surprise, he actually held her instead of pushing her away. Not trying to influence Selphie into thinking anything else but what had transpired had happened. She was still embarrassed but her happiness made her forget as she turned her head towards Selphie, still resting it on Squall's chest.

"Ummm…sorry to interrupt but you are needed onstage with Cid to address the SeeD's and guests of the party. Official duties of the SeeD Commander…sorry." Selphie said with a slight frown and a chuckle. She knew how bad Squall hated this kind of thing.

"You should be sorry to interrupt" he started with a slight scolding tone in his voice, only decipherable by people that knew him well. "Rin…I'll see you a little later." He stated looking at Rinoa, who was gently rubbing half circles into the ground with her toe.

Then, to Selphie's and Rinoa's surprise, and slightly to his own, he knelt down slowly to Rinoa's level and gently kissed her on the bridge of her nose, causing her to scrunch up her face and giggle slightly. "Bye…" He simply muttered, as he walked towards the party past Selphie.

He continually to walk by," Bye Selphie"

Selphie and Rinoa were slightly at a loss for words in the presence of only each other. Selphie finally managed to speak.

"What the hell got into him?"

"I have no idea…but I like it." Rinoa said with a smirk across her face, different shades of pink once again returning to her face.

"You got through to him Rin…he's really opening up. He's finally becoming the great man on the outside that he is on the inside." "I know" she replied happily, as a tear fell silently across her face. "Let's go take our seats Selph."

"Hey! There you two are. Over here!" Irvine raised his voice at the oncoming duo.

"Er ew eys een?" Zell slurred, half a hot dog hanging out of his mouth with two more half way down his throat.

"I think what the mannerly SeeD is trying to say is where have you two been?" Quistis said in her formal instructor voice, shooting Zell a look out of the corner of her eye.

Rinoa couldn't help but to blush again as Selphie started. "Well, I had to go inform Squall and Rinoa that he was needed onstage."

The group probably would have thought they were just talking, or lack there of, like usual. However, the actions of Rinoa and the tone of Selphie perked the group's interest.

"And just what were you two doing?" Irving stated, slightly less than yelling.

"None of your damn business, Irvine" Rinoa stated with slight sarcasm, " what my boyfriend and I do in our spare time."

"O my Hyne! He finally asked you?" Selphie spat out in enthusiasm.

"O shit…say what?" Zell managed to finish off his hotdog in time to finish off the statement Irvine had started.

"Well, its not what you two perverts are thinking but ummm…" Rinoa said almost laughing.

"Man, Squall has changed!" Zell said.

"No doubt" Irvine replied," A lot."

A smirk ran across Zell's face and he started talking again, " And what exactly happened out in space-" Irvine managed to finish Zell's statement this time, as if they were one of those couples…really weird couples at that…that knew what the other was thinking. " On the love ship? Please, do tell…we still don't know that tidbit of information." Irvine had a full-blown smile on his face by this time.

"None of your damn business, you two!" Selphie smugly said. "Ya" Rinoa added.

Seeing the four start their almost unstoppable flavorful gossipy conversation, Quistis decided to nip it in the butt. "Hush you four! This should be good." Quistis stated as Squall took the stage beside Cid.

"O Hyne!" Zell remarked, covering his face with his hands.

_Damn why is everybody staring at me?_

"Everybody's looking at me." Squall whispered at Cid as he stepped back from the microphone after introducing the Commander of SeeD. "Well…you are about to give a speech." Cid said covering his laughter with his hand.

_Dumb Question._ Squall thought as he stepped towards the microphone.

"Ummm…Hello…I am Squall Leonhart, Commander of the SeeD here at Balamb-" Squall quickly got caught off by a yelling Irvine from his friend's table near the back of the ballroom. "We know who you are Squall" Irvine yelled loud enough to be audible by all.

Zell followed suit, "Woooo! Squall!" he added in his most frat boyish voice.

They were both immediately slapped, hard, by Selphie and Quistis respectively. There were a few chuckles from the crowd as the attention turned back to a nervous Squall.

_Come on Squall…how fucking hard is it to speak your damn mind you fucking idiot. _Squall lectured himself in his head. _I will not lose the ones I care about, I will not lose the one I love, I will not lose your Rin._

The crowd grew uneasy by the moment that followed before Squall began to speak.

"Yes, as Irvine stated you do all know me" a few students looked back at Irvine who winked at the closest group of girls staring. He was once again slapped, hard, by Selphie, who shot the girls a glance making them instantly turn around.

"But truthfully I don't…think…you know me that well." Many students nodded in agreement. "However, this has been my fault…not opening up with any of you knowing that in our line of work, our profession…that it can sometimes take some of us away. I excelled at not being attached to anyone or anything…"

Irvine turned around, addressing the table of friends, "Rin, what did you do with the real Squall?" He asked trying to act innocent.

"Shut the fuck up, Irvine!" Rinoa exclaimed, instantly making him turn around in fear as the rest of the group chuckled to themselves.

"And all you know that this is uncharacteristic of me…but I am thanking everyone one of you …here or no longer with us…I …we …couldn't have done it without you." Squall stepped back from the stage with a look of sincerity in his eyes. The entire crowd applauded, however, the SeeD and all of his friends rose to the feet clapping most with tears in their eyes. The guests did not fathom …could not fathom what just took place.

His entire table of friends rose to their feet, all with tears in their eyes. The women, especially Rinoa, wearing their's with pride. Irvine did a good job of hiding his…Zell did not.

"Zell…are you crying?" Quistis stated mockingly.

"No…I got hot sauce in my eye…god does it burn…"

"Hot sauce…okay sure." Quistis laughed in between words.

The group of friends was now walking back to their dorms. The night played through Squall's head once more as they group grew smaller and smaller as they made their way through the dormitory section of Garden.

He had spent most of his time on the wall like before, except this time friends joined him. Surprisingly, to them at least, he didn't welcome them with silence he actually said a few words now and then. Then, when their song came on, he actually walked with Rin to the dance floor instead of getting dragged. He stopped thinking as he was to tired to think straight…after all it was after 1:30 in the morning…a LONG day to say the least.

He walked further than he had to as he went with Selphie and Rinoa to Selphie's dorm, where Rinoa would be staying temporarily. At least, he thought to himself, she would only be a hallway down from him.

Selphie had said her goodbyes to the obviously tired couple, anxious to say their goodbyes for the night. She knew they would rather do this without her, she thought to herself with a little chuckle. She couldn't fathom the effect Rinoa was having on him, doing what the others had tried to for so long in such a little amount of time.

"Are you gonna be here tomorrow? Or are you gonna run away and leave me by my lonesome?" Rinoa said playfully with a fake pout on her face, wasting away the seconds until she could once again meet lips with him. Every time they kissed she felt closer to him. She knew she loved him but the feeling was incomprehensible. Ever time they shared a moment, a kiss, a look into each other's eyes, she felt that she couldn't live without him. She also felt the unquenchable urge to get as close to him as possible; mentally, emotionally, and especially physically. This thought made her blush; she hoped Squall didn't notice but his next actions caught her by surprise.

"Don't you ever say that…" Squall spat, almost hatefully, quickly wishing he could retract his statement. He didn't mean to sound mean or hurtful he just wanted to assure her he wasn't going anywhere…ever. Each passing moment he felt himself falling further for her and knew…in his heart…there was no way he would ever betray her or leave her.

It took her back slightly, as she bashfully looked at the floor in hurt. Rinoa knew Squall was serious…. A lot…but his response was completely unexpected and hurtful to her. She barely noticed the tear sneak down her face in the moment of silence.

He had to reassure her, he could see that he accidentally hurt her…she was always sensitive, and the tear he caused to roll down her cheek hurt him equally as bad as it hurt him.

Once again, to Rinoa's surprise…as she was staring down at the ground…he stepped towards her. He softly placed his hands on her hips and pulled her into him. She shy fully looked up into his eyes not sure of what was transpiring before her or what to expect. She met eyes with him, only seeing love and caring in them…also they were the slightest bit glossy as if the almighty Squall Leonhart was holding back a tear.

"Rin…I will never leave you…I will always be here…" Squall started quietly," Always…"

She immediately understood the statement she made and how it had actually hurt him. She immediately felt as if she unknowingly gave the man of her dreams a low blow by questioning his commitment to her. "I'm sorry Squall…I didn't mean it like that" Rinoa sobbed, tears running down her face by this time.

She was immediately cut off once again as he moved one hand from her hip and placed it firmly, but softly, on her neck. He met lips with her once again, tender like their first time…but much longer. She could feel the emotion behind and the meaning of this kiss…and what it lacked in passion…it made up for in emotion. They continued for minutes, as it became more and more passionate. Finally, Squall traced his hand from her neck to chin raising it slightly ending the kiss, gladly welcoming the oxygen his brain had been begging for the last few minutes. Rinoa then began to speak, as they gazed into one another's eyes.

"Squall, you've changed so much" all she could do was smile.

"Is that bad?" He said with a small hint of concern in his voice.

"No Squall, it's just so incredibly nice that you actually show me that you care for me…"

"More than the world?" he replied.

"More than the world?" she questioned.

"Rin…you are my world…" he said, fully smiling for the first time that he could remember.

She replied through a huge smile, fresh tears still wet in her eyes. "Squall, I don't know what the hell has gotten into you…but I like it."

"A little bit of you I think…" He simply smiled back.

She had no words left…only emotions. Extremely complex, almost unexplainable…as if some of them didn't even belong to her. Are these Squall's emotions, she thought to herself. Regardless, she didn't care because the vast majority of these emotions were of happiness, caring, love, and lust even.

"Rin?"

"Ya?"

"I will be here tomorrow…and the day after that…and every day that follows…I promise…"

"I know …I will be here to Squall…"

A moment of silence followed, as she once again gently rested her head on his masculine chest, finding incredible comfort that was almost foreign to her in the simplest of actions. Finally, he pulled away his hands, which were both wrapped around her hips once again, gently kissing her on the forehead.

"Goodnight…Rin"

"Goodnight…Squall"

As Squall walked back toward his dorm and Rinoa proceeded to enter Selphie's dorm, they met eyes one last time, both thinking the same three words.

_I love you…_

A/N: I don't know…good or bad…in between you tell me lol….please review….it will be much appreciated…much drama and revelations in the following chapters…it gets deeper and thicker…just like the Black Forest…lol okay please review let me know what you think


	3. Wake Up Call Panic

Hey nothing new has happened. I still do not own FFVIII or any of the characters or things having to do with it.

Once again, Square Enix…rock on with your bad selves …your awesome…and you OWN FINAL FANTASY VIII !

A/N: I'm not any good at this but thanks to those who have read this and continue to do so. Hopefully you will enjoy my first fanfic as much as I enjoy writing it lol. This chapter things start to complicate things slightly…although there is some humor…enjoy :D!

Also, I have noticed that some think the swearing is slightly out of character from their characters in the game. I disagree fully. I think it depends on your opinion of how you perceive them of course they didn't swear much in a T rated RPG that they knew teens and younger children would be playing.

Think about it, they are teenagers and they are from a military academy. Even Rinoa came from a military family AND resistance faction….you know Caraway, Zone, and Watts were all dropping major F bombs.

I know this sounds kind of truthfully weird but in my head …in addition to how they act…is how they swear…it is a big part of person nonetheless. Rinoa doesn't much but occasionally explodes and throws a few big ones out there (she is a sorceress after all) Selphie doesn't much but is similar Rinoa when she gets upset. Irvine and Zell of course do quite a bit they are teenage military men remember. Squall does hardcore when he is mad, frustrated….and actually a lot at himself when he ridicules his own actions.

I am actually apologizing in advice because I have ideas for how it will get piled out later. Sections of the story where there are conversations that are RIDDLED with bad words. Quite often these conversations are kind of funny…sometimes the language helps this…sometimes they can become quite animated and funny…if you can allow yourself to loosen up for a part of a chapter and take the comical release…I mean hell Shakespeare used to do it all the time at the Globe Theater…anyone remember the gate keeper guy opening the gate to "Hell" in his own words after the murder of Duncan and all that transpires at Inverness. Anyways, it kind of appeals I think a lot to teenagers …this is taken advantage of by a lot of newer comedy that is popular these days…especially among teenagers like myself like the movie SUPERBAD (My favorite ever!!!) Don't worry! It will never be nearly as bad as SuperBad but sometimes there will be emotional releases that are helped along by foul language. Whether it be comedy through a funny conversation or anger through a swear word riddled fight. All I'm saying is. ………It's rated M for a reason…regardless of how much better I become as a writer through trial and errir…it's kind of funny but a sense of humor and bad language are a big part of me

Sorry for the RANT…just saying there is some meaning behind this not just a teenage kid with a potty mouth swearing in his fanfiction. Please don't take it as just lack for better words so he just put fuck or shit or damn…it adds flavor and makes the character…more human…I guess if you are really against it you shouldn't be reading this fanfiction sorry….Thanks enjoy the chapter….enjoy the REALLY LONG CHAPTER …Thanks one last time

This is turning out to be a REALLY LONG chapter…Merry Christmas to all of you…okay…on with the show.

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 2

Wake-Up Call / Panic

Rinoa is sitting on a bench in the commons area of the dormitory section. As she looks into the night sky, a shooting star ushers forth a volley of tears that rapidly fall of her face to her lap and the soft soil below.

"Why?" she manages to stammer through the tears.

_Rinoa crying?_

She continues to cry…more violently than before. She is alone beneath these stars that Squall and her had shared together on more than one occasion.

"Why? …Why!?"

_Rinoa…is this what you're feeling? This hurt…this anger…this…pain…?_

_**You can feel it, can't you?**_

_Hello? …Ellone? What wrong with Rinoa? …Hello? …Ellone…is that you? …Hello? …Ellone? …Ellone!_

_-------------------------------------------_

Rinoa knew he always acted mad when she woke him up, without warning, in the morning by trespassing into his dormitory. Especially, she giggled to herself, when she asked for tours…haha, she still remembered the look on his face. The look that even to this she had not completely understood. There was a slight resemblance of happiness that she wanted him to take her on a tour of Garden. However, more obvious was the look of fear and the expected, "What the fuck are you doing in my room?" look. Regardless, she wouldn't have traded one of their first personal alone moments, regardless how uncomfortable and forced it had been, for the world.

She still had the spare key she begged Zell to get his hands on for her. This was of course during her first extended trip to Garden, when they had came back to warn Garden of the danger of the quickly approaching Galbadian missiles heading their way. She remembered in this train of thought it had been about a week before she also started pestering Zell about the ring Squall wore, Griever. She welcomed these thoughts with a smile as she snuck into Squall's room with the renegade keycard, her one hand clenching his ring as tightly as possible.

_I always imagined Griever looking exactly like he did when we fought Ultimecia. Guess I did have a picture to go by… _Rinoa quickly disregarded these thoughts as she stepped fully into the main area of Squall's dorm, a few feet from his bedroom.

She took one quick glimpse in his mirror before she was willing to wake up Squall. She knew Squall would like this outfit…plus everyone would know she was Squall's girlfriend. Black turtle neck, tight are the neck…and well…other places of course, black leather skirt…mid-thigh…she knew he liked her legs, boots with heels…a couple inches, nothing to crazy, and of course her two rings, one given to her by her mother and the other the man she loved more than anything, around her neck. She was definitely sexy, not slutty…the turtleneck made sure of that. She just hope Squall liked it…

As Rinoa walked into his room, she heard him speak out towards her.

"Hello?"

_Damn he knows I'm here…there goes that idea…_

"Morning Squall!" Rinoa replied in a happy voice, obviously pleased to be in his presence.

"Hello?!"

"Ummm…over here baby." _Shit! … _She couldn't believe she just said that. Would Squall think she was stupid or…

"Hello!?!?!?"

_Is he sleeping?_

Squall immediately rolled over and stared at her in shock. He realized it was just a dream…or at least it was dream-ish. Regardless, he had to make sure.

_Damn…she looks great…_

"Rinoa!" Squall exclaimed.

"I'm sorry for sneaking into your room!" Rinoa replied quickly, hoping to avoid the lecture that she was pretty sure was about to ramble out of his mouth. Although she did find it kind of cute when he went into official SeeD conduct and rules…it got annoying as hell sometimes.

"Are you okay? Is something wrong?" Squall did a good job of masking his concern by referring to two of his most frequently asked questions to her.

"Ya…I'm fine." Rinoa said with a small smile on her face. Of course she was…she was with the man she loved with all of her heart…she didn't know what she would do without him. "What about you? Bad dream…?"

"Must have been…I don't remember" He didn't want to lie about the dream to her. However, this one was different…it was just like when Ellone sent him back to the past but this …dream…seemed different. Besides, it truly didn't matter; she was here now and perfectly fine.

Squall patted next to him on the bed as if to offer Rinoa a seat. She walked over without hesitation. She had been waiting for to get close to him again since, well…the moment they said goodbye last night. She wanted to sit right next to him…hell, she wanted to sit on him. She actually blushed at this thought as she turned around to sit down, tucking her hands underneath her skirt as she readied to lower herself next to him. Little did she know, she would get what she desperately wanted.

In a split second, as soon as she turned around to sit, before even beginning to lower herself onto his bed, he slid over directly underneath her.

Shock ran through her body as she landed on his body, turning sideways from the minor impact of their bodies of each other, she started to blush slightly. Squall wanted to scoot her up from where she had landed…almost on the tip of his knees as if he was her long lost grandpa or something of the sort. However, he didn't want to seem like the horny boyfriend who had been going out with her one day and already his primary concern was getting laid. He could use the knight-sorceress bond thing…he was just never this close to anyone before and he wanted her close physically.

"You are not that good yet, boyfriend…" Rinoa stated as Squall stared at her with uncertainty in his eyes. Something about that statement made them both smile.

_Hyne does it feel good to say that…_

_Hyne does it feel good to hear that…_

Rinoa then preceded her statement by grabbing his lower back with one hand, placing his other on his knee. Pulling his lower back and pushing off his knee, she began to slowly, almost seductively, slide up to his lap…as they were now face to face.

Neither said a word as they once again passionately pressed their lips against once another, pulling each other closer deepening the kiss. She didn't understand how she could feel this way. She wanted to explore every inch of his body, now. She knew that sorceresses and knights usually shared this kind of bond but she had felt this way before they had assumed these roles. Although It was merely he is such a dick, but I would so do him before, it was now so much more. He completed her and he loved him, even if he didn't realize how she cared for him with every ounce of her spirit and soul. They had their differences, hell, all couples did. However, she felt this only made them more well rounded. Plus, she understood him so much better now and they were growing closer by the minute.

For a short moment, her normal lines of thoughts were interrupted as a slightly darker…even more passionate one took over. By both of their actions it was made obvious to the other that they wanted one another. However, she could make him work for her affection…to feel her touch…for her to return his kisses. He could in a sense control him and emotions by playing on his primal needs that he inherited merely by having a Y in his chromosome. No, that's stupid and foolish, she thought to herself. Why would she try to do such a thing to someone that meant more to her than the world? She must have been reading too many romance novels or something. Their romance was like the novels though…almost unfathomable. She knew deep down that drama would plague them in one form or another…as it did in the novels she read and life in general. This was not drama she needed to add to their relationship by playing a childish game she thought to herself. _Just a stupid, childish, random thought… _Rinoa managed to reassure herself, as she returned his kisses with more vigor than before…almost as if to make up for slightly trying to hurt him for an instant in her head

They both ended the embrace, almost simultaneously, as they both gasped for air similar to the night before. Almost immediately, she reinitiated the display of affection, this time rubbing her right hand down his muscular chest and abdomen through his white t-shirt. She didn't care if the sorceress in her wanted the knight in Squall she just wanted Squall. They continued with these actions of raw desire as they only stopped for mere seconds to regain their breath, Squall hands now finding their way to Rinoa's hips pulling her as close as physically possible. Rinoa's hand had now found their way around Squall's neck as she hung them there supporting most of her weight on his strong shoulders. They stayed in this position for an unknown amount of time to them, as time seemed to stand still.

-------------------------------------------

She felt bad. She had said a quick shower to Zell…almost half an hour had passed since that conversation between Zell and Quistis. She remembered Zell had told her to meet him and the rest of the group in the commons area of the dormitory section. As she didn't truly focus on them until she was about twenty meters away due to her hurried pace, she noticed…they didn't notice her.

Zell and Irvine were doing practicing their impersonations of Squall it seemed, pacing back and forth with their hands placed on their heads. Usually energetic…actually, almost always energetic Selphie was leaning forward from her seat on the end of one of the tables, both hands resting on her knees supporting the weight of her sagging head.

_Maybe it's her time of the month…I got some Midol back in my dorm…_

The next thing Quistis noticed was part of the group, Squall and Rinoa, were missing. As she walked up on the silent group she got their attention.

"Where did the two star crossed lovers go?"

Zell just looked at her blankly. As Irvine raised his head and walked closer to her Selphie stayed motionless.

"Are they not here?" She restated her question in a different form…her first try obviously not working.

"…No…Rinoa is not here…and neither is Squall…" Irvine replied slowly, almost regretfully.

" Okay…did they already leave for breakfast?" Quistis thought she knew the answer to her question. "Let's go meet them…" she started to turn around and walk in the general direction of the cafeteria. No one followed in her footsteps though…as now all three of them formed a basic triangle formation: Irvine in front, Zell and Selphie to both of his sides.

"Okay…what the hell is going on?" Quistis stated raising her voice.

" Well…Quisty…I went for a jog this morning…it was pretty nice out a little cooler than it is now…and I had a idea for all of us to go to the cafeteria for breakfast…and I was like ya, you know I think I will that's a pretty decent idea…so after my jog I was like ya, I'm going to go get everybody…so I like…went and started getting everyone like I did with y-"

"Will you please get to the point?!" Quistis scoffed, clearly loosing patience and wanting an explanation for their bizarre behavior.

For the first time since their congregation, Selphie showed emotion as she started to yell. "Rinoa is gone! Before we went to bed we agreed to wake each other in the morning and go get all of you and Squall…but she was gone when I woke up by way of Zell this morning!" Selphie began to tear up.

"Ahhh…Hyne…my SeeD training is telling me to plan for the worst but it may not be the case. We just need to go get Squall and-"

"NOOO!!!" All three of them shouted in perfect unison.

"You don't think we thought of that?" Zell started almost angrily. "Hey buddy…we lost your girlfriend. Ya she is gone-" Irvine started to elaborate, " you know…the girl that you love more than your life…that you carried halfway around the world on your back and jumped out into space for Quistis! Freaking Space, okay!?!?" Irvine stopped for a second to regain his breath. " Knowing…Quistis…knowing that there was like a 99.999 percent chance that both of your lives were completely fucked!!! Basically…just because you would rather die than life without her…you know, Rinoa…that your have risked your life for countless times and are destined to be together with?! Ummm…ya …fuck we lost her" Selphie then immediately took over Irvine role as elaborator and storyteller, tears streaming from her face now. "Because Selphie was in too deep of a slumber from all damn glasses of wine Irvine continually gave her…and that her stupid ass accepted. Too deep of a slumber to hear the five masked men with 2x4's come in, abuse her, take her innocence in turns, and escape quietly with her as their prisoner into the fucking night!!!!! " Selphie was full out screaming now, as she animatedly fell to her knees into the dirt throwing her head back so hard that she almost gave herself a concussion of the hard ground. She continued by placing both of her hands over her face, moderately muffling her voice. "Awww…fuck Squall…our bad!" She managed to finish her last statement in between audible sobs.

"Wow…quite a speech…are you three done yet?" Quistis replied matter of factly, a tone of amusement being overshadowed by impatience.

"Uhhh…ya basically" Zell replied quickly, not wishing to further anger the former instructor.

"I truly doubt that Rinoa was kidnapped, hurt, or even raped…she is probably…just around somewhere. " Quistis walked decisively back toward the dorms. "We are going to get Squall."

Zell simply hung his head and trudged along, slowly following her.

Irvine gave the still sobbing Selphie an embrace…in the process helping her to her feet. Selphie responded by strongly burrowing her head into Irvine's shoulder. "I don't wanna die…" She managed to choke out.

As they slowly followed in Zell and Quistis' footsteps, using each other for physical and emotional support, he replied to her.

"Me neither darlin'…me neither."

-------------------------------------------

It had taken what had seemed to be eternity for Squall to reach his dormitory door. Of course the group knew it was only a couple seconds as they heard his hurried footsteps rushing to the door. Somehow, Zell screaming to Squall through the wooden door, "Squall this is an emergency we need you ….NOW!!!" had made Squall answer quicker. Regardless, it still felt like an eternity to the small group.

Squall looked at the group through the partially open door with concern, his chest raising and falling as he was slightly out of breath momentarily from his sprint to the door.

However, before any one the group of worried friends managed to start explaining their predicament, Rinoa's head poked out slightly from the side of him, her hand resting on his shoulder as she spoke.

"Hey guys…is everything okay?"

A/N: Sorry guys…it even seemed to myself that I was just RAMBLING on this chapter…and although is was longer than the first…not only did it not cover a night it only covered a few hours …sorry… :(…please review…if you are not too angry at me. I hope that the added detail that I actually unexpectedly started to add, even to myself, made it actually better. Who knows? Lol…you do actually so tell me …REVIEW :) thanks


	4. The Visit

I had a dream…I owned FFVIII and all the characters and stuff! …it was a dream…(sad face)

I don't own FFVIII or anything having to do with it…Square Enix does…and probably will forever

Square Enix + ownership Final Fantasy VIII

A/N: Not much to say…I already covered what I want with last chapters A/N's at the beginnings and end of the chapters…the latter being like ten minutes ago considering I am in a writing frenzy right now.

More drama in this chapter than an episode of Dawson's Creek…lol…I used to watch that show occasionally…I still remember when that girl dumped Dawson's friend on that one season finale that she cheated on Dawson with to go back out with Dawson and the camera close up with him had those HUMONGOUS crocodile tears….okay ….focus….time to write….thanks ….review please (happy face)

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 3

The Visit

The group wasn't sure how to react to the events that had just unfolded before them. Should they tell Squall what they thought had happened…or not. However, the choice to tell Squall was made for them as Selphie began to explain everything to a surprised Squall. He had opened the door expecting an emergency, not a story of how Selphie's morning had unfolded. Selphie found the courage to willingly do what she had dreaded someone else doing for her only moments before due to the fact that Rinoa was completely safe, with him in his dorm room. _Holy shit…_She thought to herself as she realized that Rinoa was completely safe with him…in his dorm room.

When Selphie was almost finished with her story to Squall, explaining that her life flashed before her eyes on her way to his room, Irvine interjected.

"It doesn't matter Squall…you were keeping her…"safe" …all this time." Irvine's voice started with happiness apparent but ended with humor, as he raised his eyebrows and his lips formed into a smirk. This statement caught Rinoa off guard, making her entire face glow shades of red and pink. For a moment Rinoa wanted to engulf Irvine's cowboy hat with a Firaga. She couldn't tell if it was more for the statement he made with obvious hidden depths …or for interrupting the obvious hidden depths that he hinted at in his smart-ass comment.

A smile crossed Irvine's face as he began to open his mouth slightly. Then, he caught sight of Selphie and Quistis. Their faces held the usual, "You're a pervert…I am going to slap you now" look that he had seen countless times before. He immediately understood that they were already reprimanding him for a statement or joke that he was going to make momentarily. It was not really a shock to Irvine, as he closed his mouth tightly, using his hand to motion as if he was using a fake key to lock it and then threw it away, satisfying both Quistis and Selphie. He realized that their group… although not truthfully together for an outstanding amount of time, had an outstanding feel for each other and at times knew how a situation was going to play out among them… even before it did. I guess that's what happens when you fight for your life alongside the same people…no, friends… everyday and trust them with yours. Every single person in the group knew that over a hundred dirty jokes or witty statements about Squall and Rinoa had crossed Irvine's mind since they got there… and he was about to express his personal favorite with them…that was of course, before he was shut down by Selphie and Quistis.

Next in this little situation, known to all, was Squall attempting to play off Irvine's statement…possibly blushing slightly…and probably responding by getting slightly angry. They were trained by his actions to expect this, Squall thought to himself, as a few flashes of anger did pass through his body.

_I have been keeping her safe asshole! …Well at least recently…I guess I was kind of the asshole before…huh, Rin? There was obviously hidden meaning behind that statement…but was this also part of that hidden message? I'm sorry I know I was an asshole to you Rin…I won't be again…I don't care I am not afraid to get hurt again…it…you are worth the risk …I love you…_

They all felt this awkward silence. They expected Squall to probably be embarrassed and slightly angry. These were emotions that Squall felt often…and of course, when Squall felt emotion he usually drifted off into that part of his head only he resided. However, Irvine and the whole group noticed, he had just kind of stood there for around 10 seconds obviously in deep thought that was spurred by Irvine's statement. Damn, Irvine thought to himself, he must be really pissed at me right now.

This scared Rinoa. It had been quite a while since he was…gone…for this long…especially in the presence of all of them. She dreaded the thought that this statement…although meaningless compared to what he had experienced over the last few months of his life…could possibly make Squall revert to his lone wolf persona again. She wrapped her fingers around his sleeved arms trying to comfort him, trying to make Squall know that she was there and was not going to go anywhere. Hoping that he was going to snap out of this moment…soon…Rinoa tightened her grip on his arm.

Irvine felt the guilt of his actions, as he tried to change the subject for Squall and bring him back from his thoughts. "So lets go get breakfast? That's what we are here for right guys?" Irvine looked around and met eyes with the group…almost pleading them for forgiveness

Although Irvine had made this statement, the entire group focus remained on Squall, whom after a moment snapped back into reality due to Irvine's statement. The entire group held their breath and hoped that this transition was going to be at least relatively smooth.

"Sorry… kind of drifted off there, huh?" Squall rose his eyes to address the entire group. He glanced back at Rinoa, smiling slightly, before continuing, "Ya, lets get some food…I have been working up a major appetite in there." He managed a smirk to rival Irvine's as he tilted his head back in a gesture to show that in there meant his dorm room…with Rinoa.

The group was shocked as their leader's statement, especially Rinoa, who blushed feverishly and playfully slapped the arm she had a hold of with her other hand. "Squall!" Her playful attempt at trying to sound offended failed miserably.

An immense wave of relief poured over the entire group, even Squall, at how calmly he had handled the situation. He had even cracked a joke…he was changing so much. It was as if he had taken the first few steps and it was becoming easier with each passing one, as if he was running downhill.

"HAHAHAHAHA…" Zell was laughing so hard that his eyes were starting to water. "Squall…ha…haha…made…ha…a …ha…joke!"

-------------------------------------------

Something did not feel right. As Squall walked into Cid's office his fears were confirmed as he easily read the look of fear and anxiousness in Cid's eyes. Only moments ago, a few minutes after sitting down in the cafeteria for breakfast with his friends, the loudspeaker could be heard over everything else.

_**This is Headmaster Cid…would Commander Squall please report immediately…I repeat…if you are hearing this Squall please report immediately.**_

Thoughts quickly shoot through his mind after locking eyes with the Headmaster about what could be so important? As he prepared for the worst he decided to go directly to the source and safe himself some time.

"Sir, you wanted me?"

"Yes, Squall, I do…" the Headmaster proceeded in a monotone voice.

_Has he been practicing what he is about to tell me?_

"I would like to talk about Rinoa." Cid finished his statement, before pausing momentarily.

_…? We already had this conversation old man last night at the party…she will be staying here with us…it is the least Garden can do by offering her a place to life after help defending the world…What else could it be…you wouldn't dare probe and poke around in our…personal life would you…_Personal…that world had struck a cord as soon as it what Squall had thought to himself truly sunk in. _No way…there is no way in hell…could he know…?!_

"Sir , with all due respect we already had this conversation last night at the ceremony and I do not wish to discuss our private life. If you have heard the rumors, they are indeed true…Rinoa and I are now in a relationship but beyond that I truly see no point in-"Cid cut off Squall who was trying to avoid any further discussion by acting overly formal…to a man in Cid that was always to informal even when the situation called for the contrary.

"Of course Squall…then let's talk about Ultimecia…"

_No…there's no way…how the hell does he know? No …chill…he may just want to wish for details…_

"I don't see the point in that either, sir" Squall managed through clenched teeth, desperately hoping not to hear what he was about to.

"…Well as we both know Squall…they are the same person."

Mass amounts of thoughts shoot into his brain like an injection from a needle and he couldn't find the source …although he knew what it was. Before he drifted off into thought a mixture of anger, fear, and especially curiousity……he HAD to know…if Cid knew maybe he could help him understand……had him replying merely by what his heart told him to as he felt himself losing all ability to control himself.

"Sir, of course I know" Squall had his teeth clenched still, now in anger." …how ..the …hell …wouldn't I ?!"

"I know Squall…your confused you wanted answers…we decided that now would be the best times to give you our knowledge on this whole situation….your role…the cycle…everyt-"

He spoke out so fast his thoughts…_we? …we?! …my role? …the cycle?! … what the hell is going on? _…had not even completely ran through his head yet.

"We? What the fuck do you mean we?!" Squall spat out hatefully. Then immediately it hit him, as he remembered thoughts that seemed to have such little importance …until now.

How Cid had made him leader for the Timber mission…even though Squall had expressed his unhappiness. All the conversations Edea and him had around Rinoa as him as if they knew information they did not…and of course they did. How Cid told Squall secretly that he believed in Timber Owl's cause and that's why he made up the difference with his own money so Seed could help the Owls…so he could help Rinoa. Their cause was fighting his wife when Ultimecia possessed her…when Rinoa possessed her…that Cid even later accidentally slipped and told Rinoa, before the final showdown with his wife and Rinoa herself, that he was against the Owl's cause completely. She used powers that Edea had …powers she had received from the sorceress would control her later or earlier in time…it was all so confusing ….well later but earlier… _**What the fuck is going on!!! **_Thoughts continued to pour into Squall as the floodgates opened in his mind. Anger overwhelmed Squall, as all lines started to blur in his head as all the memories started to overlap and intertwine in a way that merely hurt him, confused him, and made him feel like the little boy once again alone by himself.

In anger, Squall took out his gunblade aiming it the man's chest across from him.

"Edea and you! You two knew this whole fucking time?! You have been sitting on the fucking sidelines watching this unfold you son of a bitch!!!"

Squall closed the gap on Cid, less than a foot now separated Squall's gunblade from entering his chest. Using what little self-control he had left, he returned his gunblade to its sheath. Upon doing this, he immediately stared into Cid's eyes with enough passion to burn holes through his soul. He managed to control the rage tensing up his body and mind enough to speak, although the anger was the extremely decipherable in his voice.

" Explain Cid! Now!!!"

Cid ended the moment of silence that was clearly against Squall's wishes immediately. He did not want to anger the immensely powerful man before him, as he started to speak…almost in the form of a plea.

"I will explain…completely to you know Squall," Cid managed to get the words to come out…they were coming out easier now…" but first there are two things. First, you must understand Edea and I discussed this thoroughly and often a long time ago…"

_A long time ago…?!?! They knew a long time ago……fucking time compression! She has existed in the past, present, and future all along!_

"… And we thought it was best to wait until after …you killed her…for us to have this talk. …Second, …you must let me explain fully and please do not interrupt…it will be much easier and less frustrating on us both this way!"

_Frustrating!?!?! How dare you…you don't know the meaning you son of a bitch!_

Regardless, he had to know the truth he had to know everything. The enraged young knight only managed to merely nod his head slight, anger still evident all over his face. The elderly former knight took this as Squall's way of agreeing. He sighed, as he finally started to explain.

"Squall there is no clear cut beginning…so I will start our my beginning with this whole thing. …That fateful day at the orphanage Rinoa passed on her powers to Edea…you both were both there…but you didn't realize that in her dying moments Rinoa tried to explain everything to Edea. Squall, you see…at some point in the future…Rinoa lost control of herself to the sorceress within…Ultimecia. When this happened…through time compression Rinoa began to unwillingly influence the past and present…her past and present…your past and present. " Cid paused for a moment trying to think of how to explain to Squall.

"This cycle that I spoke of is the events that have unfolded and happened to both you and Rinoa…and everyone around you in the last few months. Actually, mostly your last few months but truthfully your entire life." Cid could no longer look at Squall, as he stood diligently at his desktop, as if having this conversation with it.

"With the little strength and will power Rinoa had left over she managed to warn Edea to send Ellone away to save her from both of them. Only people that are close to you, including Edea and I, realize that this event ultimately shaped your personality and outlook on life for your life from that point forward until recently. By doing this, Rinoa made you realize your potential as you trained full heartedly and put everything into your SeeD training. Thanks to her, you became the strongest SeeD ever …fitting to be her knight and save her from herself…and eventually have the strength to actually be able to kill her. See, Squall one of your big motivation is that until you saw that day when Ultimecia came and turned Edea into a sorceress for yourself in time compression after you defeating her, you had it repressed deeply in your memory. However, it was still there …in your unconsciousness…a deep hate for the sorceress and a need to become ever stronger to one day re enact your revenge…on the sorceress…on Ultimecia…on Rinoa…who took your sister away from you." This whole thing was becoming dizzying to both of them, as Cid now placed one hand on his desk to stabilize himself more emotionally than physically.

"Rinoa…or the sorceress within rather…had taken control of Edea a few years ago…years before you two met and fell in love. Thanks to Ultimecia controlling Edea…and Edea controlling Galbadia… behind the scenes…including all the officials of Galbadia…such as Rinoa's father, General Caraway. Due to Ultimecia's effect on this world …this time…Rinoa left her father to begin fighting him and Galbadia as a member of the Timber Owls Resistance Force. Thanks to Rinoa, even though it was unaware to her, you two met and fell in love later. Later on, when Edea influenced Ultimecia within her to take control of Rinoa and pass on Edea's powers. The powers Ultimecia…the powers Rinoa… ultimately gave her in her future and Edea's past. Edea did this because it was one of the requests and pieces ofadvice that the Rinoa that remained in the dying Ultimecia gave her in the past …on that fateful day. Ultimecia did this willingly though because she didn't know she recommended it herself. The Ultimecia that you fought through Edea and ultimately as herself in time compression…"

_I don't fucking understand Cid…I don't fucking want to understand!!!_

" …gave her powers to herself by giving them to Rinoa. This was when she was still alive in the future fighting her past. She didn't know about the last few moments of her life when Rinoa used her internal strength to take control over her. She still had life left…she still had to make herself release Adel in the past and fight you in her future and have you kill her. She was unaware of how she was complying to Rinoa's wishes by giving her the power that was rightfully hers. This is because Rinoa's wishes were carried out by Edea that she gave in the past …but it was in Ultimecia's future because she was still alive and yet to lose her life to her knight…you…while protecting her from herself" Cid stopped to ponder what he was saying and regain his focus and breath. However, Squall refused to any longer sit by and listen to Cid.

"Nothing you are fucking saying makes any sense! It's all wrong it's all patchwork. Every moment is affected because of something that happened in the future past or present of the future or past. This makes no FUCKING SENSE CID…not one word you have stated makes full sens-" This time Cid cut off Squall.

"Don't you fucking get it Squall!?!? None this makes sense it never will! Everything that happened, is happening right now, or hasn't happened yet affects everything that has happened, that is happening right now, or has not happened yet!"

"Just fucking quit just explain it to me simpler. I don't fucking need a story of our past, present and future…please Cid just explain" Squall's voice gave way to remorse and sadness toward the end of his statement, as he pleaded with Cid to make him understand.

"This whole time…the past, the present, and the future…it's a constant war through time through others waged on Rinoa by Ultimecia and Ultimecia by Rinoa. Simply put, its an cycle…without Rinoa there is no Ultimecia, without Ultimecia there is no Rinoa…they coexist Squall they don't realize this themselves but they cannot survive without each other. Without Rinoa's future, she has no past. Without her past, she has no future. It's the unknown question…it's like which came first…the chicken or the egg…there is no clear-cut answer…there may not be not answer at all. No egg, no chicken. No chicken, no egg. No Rinoa, no Ultimecia. No Ultimecia, no Rinoa."

"That's fucking bullshit Cid! Rinoa was born Rinoa…her name is Rinoa…she wasn't born Ultimecia…she was born Rinoa…she is Rinoa!"

Cid, compelled by this moment that they were sharing, noticing that Squall was more vulnerable now than ever before, rose from his desk. As he walked up to Squall, he put his hand on Squall's shoulder. As the young man rose his face, level with his, they met eyes.

"You are out of the cycle now…this is the future past the future…however you still are fighting the past, present, and future…you are both fighting your past."

"I won't let her fall Cid. I promised myself that after discovering the truth when we killed her Cid. She…she …had my ring…I saw it…it was there…hanging from her lifeless body. I killed her Cid…I killed the woman I love…" Squall had no idea why he was saying this…and to all people Cid.

"That's the beauty of this whole thing Squall, she was your past…and you still have her…not Ultimecia…but Rinoa. You have her right now…in your present, in your future."

Oddly enough to Squall, both men, both knights of sorceresses at one time or point in their past, present, or future, were now crying. He knew what he had to ask what had been plaguing his thoughts since he knew the truth…but now more than ever.

_Hyne…please…don't be this cruel…_

"Cid…" Squall struggled to continue and find the words, but he knew he had to. He had to for himself and for Rinoa. " I know Rinoa's past and present…but is her future already set. Is she going to be Ultimecia…and start this whole thing over?"

"Maybe or maybe not…you will know in the future…but you will never know in your past." Cid lowered his hand from Squall's shoulder, but with new found resolve continued to stare the man in the eyes.

"Cid!" Squall didn't mean for it to come out that mean, and he quickly adjusted his tone. "Cid…please …what do those words mean?"

"If she becomes Ultimecia…she will use Odine's machine and start this all over again. If she doesn't …if she remains Rinoa …you will never know in your past …only your future…with her. This is because she will never use the machine to travel to the past…to fight her past…you two will be together…in the future."

"I thought you said that they cannot exist with each other…that they need each other…to be each other…" Squall asked with concern in his voice.

"That's true…but she always will exist…in your past…it's up to you if she exist in your future or not…and always in an alternate universe…in another one of your future's she will always be Ultimecia."

" It's up to me then?"

"Squall it always had been…regardless of how much destiny has to do with our lives…everything is ultimately based on the choices we make."

_I will not lose you again Rinoa…I love you_

"Squall…" Cid started," _**I will always be your past, your present, and your future…no matter what"**_

Squall staggered back from Cid, suddenly feeling weak. Cid was caught by surprise and tried to offer the young knight a hand. He pushed it away with unexpected force…almost sending the older man back into his desk.

"What…what…what did you say?!" Squall spat out, demanding the man to answer, as pain crept from his toes up throughout his entire body.

" I never got a chance to," Cid started cautiously, obviously taken back by the actions of the young man before him.

_What is this …who's there…?_

Squall fell to one knee, as the pain overtook his body…the familiar pain. Suddenly, his legs gave out as his body gave weigh under his weight sending the two oval chairs across from Cid's desk into the side wall from the impact of his body.

_Rin…is that you?_

_**Remember Squall…you promised…**_

_I'll never forget…If you go there you will find me…_

_**Always quite the romantic… **_The voice let out a soft laugh in his head. _**Baby, don't be scared…**_

_For the first time in my life I'm not…Rin…?_

_**Yes?**_

Cid rushed to his body, convulsing on the floor. As he screamed down the hall for his aid to get help, the body in front of him went motionless. He stood knelt there beside Squall's body as help rushed into his office. It took the Headmaster everything in him to hold back the smile across his face. _He always did listen to you, you know he's really stubborn…reminds me of myself in my youth…_The Headmaster cut his thoughts short as he helped the SeeD's help their unconscious Commander down to the Infirmary.

_Rin…I love you…_

_**Squall…I always have loved you**_

A/N: Review please! Thanks


	5. The Fire and the Flames

I do not own Final Fantasy VIII or any of the characters…they belong to Square Enix.

A/N: Hey guys, still writing…hope your still reading…please REVIEW it's greatly appreciated…sorry if the last chapter ending made you confused and wanting more…well I don't have much to say maybe next chapter so without further ado …

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 4

The Fire and the Flames

Squall raised himself slightly off a patch of wildflowers and weeds that made a patchwork bed of sorts. With pain still pulsing throughout his head, neck, and back, he tried to soften the pain by rubbing his neck with his hand. He managed to regain complete control of his body and mind as he rose to his feet from the trampled flowers that lay at his feet.

_How is this possible? …_

He had been sent into a different times many times by Ellone, Squall thought to himself, but this was different. When Ellone transported Squall to the past he always took a third person perspective of sorts. Always near his father, Laguna, and the others…however, at the same time, always looking at them from a distance. Now he was actually in a different time, a different place, he realized to himself. Then again it wasn't Ellone that sent him here…it was Rinoa…

_Rin…where are you at? _He thought…not expecting a reply in his mind as before…only hoping for it. There was no reply to his thoughts this time as he finally began to focus on his surroundings.

The sun was setting in the distance off the horizon of the ocean. Squall knew where he was.

_The field…? This is where we promised Rin…where are you?_

Everything was familiar to Squall. The patches of wildflowers and vegetation that lay at his feet and below his current position spurred thoughts and memories into his brain. As Squall looked down upon the field of flowers that lay below him from the slight hill he stood upon he knew he at the place they made their promise. It was slightly different though…similar colors and sights arranged slightly different. He realized that he was in a different part of the field that he had never seen before.

_You are here somewhere Rin…I just have to find you…_

The light given off from the setting sun gave the entire feel a warm tint and glow…something was off though. The sounds of seagulls and the wildlife in the distance faded out as Squall realized a soft humming sound…a flicker that continually evaded his hearing and returned just as swiftly. He now noticed the subtle panic in the sounds around him…of the chirping of birds and squawking of seagulls that grew fainter by the moment…almost as if everything around him was covered in layers of panic and hurry.

_What is that noise…_Squall thought to himself as he turned around towards the sound, the vibrant colors covering his senses and body as he was blinded momentarily.

_O…Hyne no…_Time seemed to stand in place as he viewed the entire flower field in flames, along with the orphanage that he once called home in the distance. _…No …no!_

-------------------------------------------

The entire groups gaze was fixated on his unconscious form, as Squall laid there motionless …almost as if in a deep slumber…upon the bed in Dr. Kadowaski's office. His friends enclosed around the bed their friend laid upon as Rinoa kneeled down next to him taking his warm hand in both of hers. They had just arrived there moments before…in a sprint…as soon as they heard the news that quickly circulated around Garden to their table in the cafeteria.

"His temperature and breathing are normal…." the plump female doctor explained to the group to reassure them. "…It seems as if he… is just resting…no doubt badly needed from the experiences and battles that he has been a part of the last few days. Squall will be fine." Dr. Kadowaski finished as she stayed in her position slightly outside the resting room of the infirmatory and the circle of friends.

"He will be fine…" Cid repeated the female's statement that stood slightly to his right, as he leaned slightly against the wall…just like Squall would…with slight worry across his face. _I hope…_

Edea and him had made the hypothesis that Rinoa may try to reach Squall once more from the future once the two men had their heated conversation. From her other future…as Rinoa…the two had hoped long ago. She would know about their conversations and the turmoil that was going on with Squall, Cid thought to himself. She would try to help him as she would knew about this conversation as it was part of his ever evolving past, present, and future…to comfort and console him. Hopefully, he continued to himself, to reassure him everything would be okay and not to give up. This was just a hypothesis however, they could have been…but obviously weren't…wrong. He had told Squall she wouldn't affect their past, present, and future if he saved her only minutes before now…but deep down he hoped that she would.

"Headmaster" Zell addressed Cid as he stepped towards him slightly.

"Yes?"

"The way you said he had just randomly stumbled… fell to the ground…basically had a seizure…this isn't the first time…" He paused momentarily as the rest of the group, save Dr. Kadowaski, met eyes with him and then the Headmaster, nodding slightly.

"This is what he did…what we all did…when Ellone took us to the past." Zell knew he had explained these occurrences to Cid weeks ago…he just hoped he remembered this through all the chaos that had transpired over that time.

"Yes…I do believe you are right…" Cid stated, now standing straight up removing his shoulder from the wall. "If that's the case then he could wake up any second now, right?"

"Ya…" Zell replied, now extending his voice more to the group of his friends than to the Headmaster. "…But…I don't …understand. If this is because of Ellone…why would she take him back…again…and now after all that has happened…just him… Why?" As he finished his statement he closed his eyes shrugging his shoulders in confusion.

Upon reopening his eyes, Zell caught Irvine's glance from across the room behind the motionless man and the kneeling woman. He was shaking his head with his hand outstretched against the window seal that offered a view into the other section of the infirmary.

" I don't know Zell…but we can all get filled in from Squall himself when he wakes up…" Irvine now closed his eyes rubbing his face with his free hand in a Squall-like manner.

Rinoa had heard all of the conversation …but her focus still remained on Squall…even during the slight moment she raised her eyes off him at Zell's statement. She squeezed his hand with hers…almost hoping that this would make him wake up. She knew he was going to wake up…just like he had about a month ago in the forest on their way to Galbadian Garden. However, this didn't stop the sorceress from worrying for her boyfriend, her love, and her knight…as she fought back fears and thoughts of the worst.

_Squall… you are going to wake up… you have to wake up. I'm not going to lose you…I love you…_

_-------------------------------------------_

_Hyne, No! …WHY!? …HOW !?!?_

The tears running down Squall's face reflected the light of the blazing orphanage and field in the distance. He noticed it was slowly spreading towards him, from his front and sides…starting to slowly spread behind him as well…as it was easier for the flame to burn through the flat plains of the field than to climb the hill he was atop of. The tear's path down the knights face slowed as it started to dry from the heat around him that he was now starting to feel.

_Where is everyone at…where are you at…are you all dead ?! …_

As thoughts of the worst plagued his mind as to what happened to his friends…and to Rinoa…he closed his eyes. He realized that he was not going to survive this…he was surrounded on all sides…by the fire and flames…and death. The pain of the likely death of everyone he cared about he had not witnessed…and his own that he was about to witness first hand…felt bittersweet.

_At least…I'll be with you …forever now…Rin… _He managed to choke back the pain that his heart was being ripped out as he reopened his eyes…turning back around to one last time glance at what little of the flower field remained in the distance away from the orphanage…away from the flames…where they had made their promise. As he raised his face …his view was blocked…by her…by Rinoa…as she was there behind …now in front…of him…unknown to Squall until now. She was on one knee staring at him

Rinoa was covered in blood…as were her angel wings. As Squall ran to her injured form to offer help she extended her hand as she screamed.

"No!!! …Stay away from me!" Squall didn't heed her words, as he continued to narrow the gap between them to less than five feet. Again, she screamed out with anger in her voice. "Stay the fuck away from me, Squall! I'm warning you…I…" Squall looked her in the eyes, both of them with tears freely falling from their faces, almost pleading with her. "Rinoa, I'm here…I'm not going anywhere…just like I promised." Squall stood at Rinoa…as he noticed the veins across her soft delicate face start to darken and pulsate. Her complexion began to darken around the eyes and mouth…as her pale face gave way to shades of gray.

"Fucking lies! …you …you …kursed SeeD …and your fucking lies!" Rinoa screamed, her voice now booming as it went deeper than he knew possible. "You are fucking here because I sent you here…to see this! …To see what you have caused!!!"

A feather caught his attention out of the corner of his eye momentarily; similar to how it had when he was in time compression, flying towards him gracefully in the wind. Another white feather now…then another one…then two more…as he actually took his eyes off Rinoa before quickly putting them back onto her. Her wings were losing feathers and they started to crunch up as in almost as much pain as she was… as Rinoa let out a loud scream in pain. Her wings began to darken and new bone supporting the wing began to jut out…turning the one curvaceous and smooth wings into a more jagged form similar to the wings that were adorn by Diablos.

_All her power…all of Adel's she received…turning against her…she's falling …O Hyne no! …this can't be… NO!!!_

Once again Rinoa looked into the torn Squall's eyes, this time it was different…It was almost as if she was pleading with him from deep within herself.

"Squall…you …AHH…promised…AAHHHHHH!!!" Rinoa continued to scream in pain as now it was spreading throughout her arms that were placed on the ground holding her weight. Veins became darker…more noticeable in her arms …and in her hands as her fingernails that were now digging into the soil were black. " you…you…AHHHH!!! …promised …you ….would…AHHH!!!" Squall quickly replied to her, not wanting to hear one more of her screams that were so painful…as if she was dying inside.

" I did promise Rinoa! I told you I would always be here and-" Rinoa cut him off as if she had no time to spare. Truthfully, she had no time to spare…she felt herself slipping away completely.

"Yes I know Squall…Squall…AHHH!!! ….Squall!!! …listen to me…I love you…I always will love AHHHHH!!!!… Squall …you know what you must ….AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! …you know what you must do!!! Do it!!!" Rinoa shouted, not asking him…but ordering him to, as she managed a nod at Squall's hand that was placed on his gunblade handle.

Squall had placed his hand on his gunblade thanks to instinct and fear. As soon as she made her statement, with clear intentions, he immediately removed his hand from his Lion Heart.

_No way in hell Rinoa…will I ever hurt you…_

_**You have to Squall!!! It's too late for me…I'm sorry**_. The sobbing voice of Rinoa's in his head startled Squall, who managed to regain his composure and locked eyes with Rinoa.

_I won't hurt you Rinoa…_

_**Do it Squall! It's now or later…or should I say earlier!?!?…one way or another as I predicted your gunblade will pierce my heart…I would have it no other way Squall…save us both the pain and hassle and just do it now!…end this cycle…do it NOW!!!**_ During this inner dialogue between the two, Rinoa had managed herself to her feet. She was now standing face to face with Squall, only inches away, pleading to him with her beautiful, caring, tear streaked eyes to do it.

Squall could no longer stand the guilt or the pain. He could simply no longer look her in the eyes as he closed his blue eyes.

_Rinoa…I will not hurt you !!! …I won't …_

_**Squall! You have already hurt me in so many fucking ways….so many ways!!! Just do it! DO IT NOW!**_

There was an absolute silence between them, no words or thoughts were spoken or heard. He could not understand the meaning of her words…could not comprehend the hurt he felt from her saying them…could not understand why or what she had meant by them. Finally, tears still sliding down his eyes, he managed to mentally reply.

_Rinoa? …What do you mean hurt you in so many ways? _There was only silence.

_What do you mean…so many ways…I was only trying to protect you…_His only reply was silence.

_I'm sorry…please forgive me…_He waited longer this time…the complete silence scaring him. Finally, Squall could not bare the silence anymore.

_RINOA!?!? …_

_**I AM NOT RINOA…**_

Squall flinched at this, immediately opening his eyes in response …hoping to see Rinoa's caring eyes staring back at him…almost as if to say, "Everything will be alright…"

The last thing Squall saw was the black empty eyes staring back at him.

-------------------------------------------

The room had grown silent since the conversation had ended minutes before. Everyone had kept their relative positions…as if they were statues or guards standing at their post. They were just waiting…Rinoa was just waiting…for Squall to wake up and reassure them as their leader, as their friend, as her lover, as her knight…that everything would be alright.

They were expecting Squall to awake gradually from the sleep that was forced upon him…like they always had when Ellone had sent them back…they knew he would have a hell of a headache.

This didn't go as plan though as when Squall finally awoke, he awoke suddenly almost jumping off the bed. He swung his feet around the bed so quick, attempting to get in a seating position, he nearly laid his girlfriend out with a boot to the face. Rinoa responded by quickly jumping backwards up to her feet, smashing into Irvine who was behind her.

"Damn…owwww!" Irvine held his ribs as he moved away from everyone, primarily away from Rinoa, into the corner.

Squall was awake for less than three seconds but was already sitting on the infirmary bed with his head between his hands lost deeply in thought.

"Squall, your awake!" Rinoa exclaimed, as she leaned forward to give him a warm hug. Like the Squall of old, he responded by swiftly getting his hands onto her shoulders and gently pushing her away. She took this merely as they were in a room packed with people and he had just woken up…in layman terms, no big deal.

The group sat there for a minute watching Squall who was still lost in thought. They weren't sure what to do as moments continued to pass by in silence.

_How…How is any of this possible…How did Rinoa send me…how did she …send me to the future? It was the future, right? …why to… when she fell…she was trying to warn me…? I don't…I don't understand_

The uneasiness continued to grow among the group as they continued to stare at Squall.

_It's too late for me Squall…save us both the hassle?!?! …you have already hurt me…in so many fucking ways!?!?!? I've only ever tried to protect you to give you my love…to prevent you from becoming Ultimecia…Fuck this …you can't deal with this shit Squall…Rinoa already just made it very clear to you that you cannot succeed …that you are doomed to fail…to see the woman you love fall…why waste my time? …hurt me in so many fucking way!?!? How could you say that?!?!_

Finally, Cid could no longer take the silence. He had to know if everything had gone well and Edea and him had hoped and prayed for. With an obvious smirk across his face, that Cid did his best to hide…failing miserable, he addressed Squall.

"So did you have fun?" Cid said playfully with a smirk across his face that was puzzling to the rest of the group, and simply infuriating to Squall.

_You have known this whole fucking time…more than either of us have…are you playing some kind of sick fucking game with me Cid…_

"What did you say…I didn't quite catch what you said Cid…could you repeat that one more time Cid?" Squall cocked his head slightly to the side, hiding his fury fairly well, although the group could tell something was different with his voice…this also perplexed the entire group of SeeD's, one doctor, and young sorceress.

"Ya…Squall I said did you have fun?" This time the smirk became a full blown smile…this got the group so confused by this time that Quistis, Zell, Selphie, Irvine, and Dr. Kadowaski were all about to ask what was going on.

Cid did not mean to be hurtful or throw anything in Squall's face. The old man truthfully did not know anything was to be thrown in the young commander's face. He had imagined everything had went well…something along the lines of him and Rinoa talking…and other things…Rinoa telling him that she was okay in the future…and that he just had to protect her in her past, in both of their presents. He couldn't even fathom what had really transpired in his mind or what he actually saw.

Before anyone could even react, even Cid, the young man with unbelievable strength had the former knight Cid Kramer pinned against the side of Dr. Kadowaski's desk, choking the air out of the man with his left hand, unsheathing his gunblade with his right.

They all couldn't believe their eyes. More of this transpired….shocking the rest of the group, leaving them frozen in their positions for a split second before they rushed out into the main section of the infirmary where the two men were…Zell and Rinoa taking the lead.

"Did I have fun?!?!? DID I HAVE FUN!?!? I WILL KILL YOU YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH!" Cid was starting to turn all facets of the color red as now Squall had his gunblade raised up directly above him as if ready to actually strike Cid.

"SQUALL! WHAT AR-" Rinoa started to scream, running toward her love. Immediately, Zell cut her off in her path and cut off her plea by screaming louder than she was.

"SQUALL! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING MAN!?!?" The martial artist proceeded to jump up, round house kicking Squall's gunblade hand, sending it crashing off the wall landing near the entrance to the infirmary.

Squall responded by removing his hand from Cid, leaving him breathing heavily as he slumped down against the desk he was previously forced against. Zell was partially expecting retaliation, as he assumed a defensive stance but it didn't matter. Squall caught Zell with a hard quick left hook that the fighter had no chance of reacting to in time to parry.

As the blow landed squarely on Zell's face, sending him sprawling face first into the ground a couple feet back, the sound of Squall's hand shattering off the Seed's face was booming.

Squall stood there, hands hanging heavy to his side, breathing deeply, his chest raising and falling. The entire group was frozen in place. Zell eventually turned his body around enough to see Squall face to face. Blood trickled down from his clearly broken nose that was about an inch and a half from where it should be on Zell's face, and streaming down to his shirt from the sides of his slightly agape mouth. The martial artist laid there with a look of anger, hurt, and betrayal on his face speechless… which was mirrored by the entire group.

Rinoa didn't know what to think. She had never saw the man she loved with all her heart this angry. Never before, including now, had he scared her. Still, she didn't scare her…she knew he would never hurt her. However, she feared deeply for everyone else in the same room as Squall.

There was no reasonable thing that could be said. They all stood there speechless…staring at Squall…Squall merely staring back at Rinoa.

_Rinoa I love you…but I think I finally know the answer to that stupid fucking question…somehow the egg came first…somehow Ultimecia came first…you showed me that and you don't even realize it…_

Finally, Squall broke the deadly silence.

"I'm leaving…Cid…" He stared down at the man still at his feet, now with both hands around his neck massaging it, fear easily readable through his widened eyes staring back at the man above.

"…I think you better find another Commander…" Squall quickly turned around, walked over to the wall to retrieve his Lion Heart. As he placed his gunblade where it belonged, he stated himself once more as if to make everyone, including himself, believe it. "I'm leaving…"

A small gasp managed to escape the group of SeeD's, standing or laying on the floor, at their Commander's actions in the last few moments.

Rinoa felt as if her heart was breaking as he said these words. Never had she felt this bad before, not even when her mother died. The words stung her soul and her mouth as she tried to choke out her words. She knew that he meant he was leaving…he was leaving all them…and her. She wouldn't believe it…she refused to believe it. Even if she did on the surface of her emotions and consciousness, both of their unconscious minds knew that they would never leave each other.

She finally managed to choke out her words to Squall, who was now facing them in the silhouette of the doorway.

"So that's it your just leaving…your leaving us…your leaving me Squall…that's it your leaving?" She said almost as if begging him to reconsider.

Squall turned his head away from the group …and Rinoa. However, she saw what she had never seen from the man before. It tore her up inside…made her feel like dying…but at the same time comforted her immensely. She now knew that something had happened in that dream he was in….obviously…they all knew that…but she now knew that he would never truly leave her…he may just need times to find answers to whatever it was he saw. Rinoa saw a tear.

As he walked out the door to the infirmary, one world was audible to the stunned group that remained in the room.

"Whatever…"

A/N: haha…drama, drama, drama…

And I just apologized for last chapters ending lol sorry guys…many more to come I will try to get the next chapter up in the next week or sooner.

One last thing…REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW !!!!!!!!!!!!…..please …thanks


	6. Relief and Regret

Square Enix owns FFVIII…I don't

A/N: Hey guys…I know it's been a little bit since the last installment of this story…sorry. I was basically righting a chapter a night and felt like taking a little break…and actually started a new story…it's pretty unique take a look at if you want to…it's on my page, duh lol. Plus, I've been kinda sick the last few days. Regardless, without further ado…another crazy chapter…. o yah…can you REVIEW it please? Thanks!

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 5

Relief and Regret

Squall didn't know where his feet were taking him. However, he was in too much pain in every description of the word to resist. Oddly enough, he ended up where no one, absolutely no one, would expect to find him. He ended up in the Quad, behind the stage, a spot he didn't even know existed, until his feet managed to drag his body here.

At least nobody will find me here… 

He dropped onto the ground with a loud sigh…managed to relax thanks to the peacefulness of his surroundings. As he looked up into the sun high in the sky, he realized regardless of all the craziness that happened to him this day, it was still early to mid-afternoon.

_We should be back at Balamb by tomorrow…_Squall thought to himself, remembering what Cid had said at the ball about wanting to move the garden back to it's original position, when it was not mobile, due to the peaceful times they were now in. However, Cid had decided to take the scenic way home by traveling throughout all of the world's different climates and regions. A good learning experience for the junior cadets, he remembered the overweight middle-aged man that he was strangling the life out of not too long ago saying.

_Damn…what the hell did I do? …But why the hell would you say that Cid…this isn't some sick game…it's my fucking life…_

Squall was torn, as part of him wished they were back by Balamb, not floating over the middle of the ocean, so he could get as far away from this as possible. However, the other side was glad he couldn't leave garden and run…he was tired of running from his problems. Besides, what difference would running make? He could never really escape Ultimecia…the Rinoa he wronged in the future…it was apparent she was in his head.

_What did I do Rinoa? …How did I betray you? I already hurt you in so many fucking ways? …how? _

Time passed by quickly, as the young hero stared off into the view of the ocean…lost deeply in thought. Squall didn't even realize that most of the time tears were running down his face as he debated what to do about the love of his life.

_Fuck! …Rinoa…you know I love you…more than anything in the world…but maybe this is your way of telling me something. Your way of saying thanks to you my future is doomed…so ummm…yah…I don't really want to be in a relationship with you…I don't really want to have a future…or have my future involve you anymore. Even if you don't realize it…I think you are breaking up with me. At least this way…if we go our separate ways before we get anymore attached…we won't get hurt…oh trust me it will hurt me for the rest of my life…but at least not as bad. That way when I leave you …you won't feel as deeply loving or dependant on me and won't feel as betrayed…and won't turn into Ultimecia._

Squall…if you love me as much as I love you…you will never leave me… Rin!?!? Is that you!?!? 

_**Who else would it be Squall? **_Rinoa's voice inside his head chuckled a little bit.

_You already showed me why we should do this Rin…I never want to hurt- _Squall was taken back by pain as he tried to get to his feet, falling back down immediately, as the pain once again rose from his back, up through his spine, until it seemed as his head would explode. _Rinoa! Don't do this again…I couldn't …I wouldn't be able to watch you go through that again…because of me…I'm sorry! …but if I watch you go through that again…I might go insane!_

You still don't get it Squall…I know that…that's why I must show you… 

_No…please! …I … _Squall couldn't finish his plea as he fell to the ground in pain. Finally, he gave into it and relaxed into a deep slumber as the pain he felt vanished.

-------------------------------------------

Almost a hour had passed, but the group still remained in it's entirety. Zell was now sitting on Dr. Kadowaski's desk, as she cast a Curaga spell on the young man. His nose slowly slid back to its original position on Zell's face. As the swelling that had the bottom half of his face looking like a slab of meat resided, he uttered his thank you to the doctor.

Still few words were exchanged, as Cid, Quistis, and Irvine were now sitting, Cid still massaging the crinks and discoloration out of his neck. A sadness overtook the room at what they had just witnessed…there wasn't a completely dry eye in the room. Selphie was comforting Rinoa, holding her in a tight embrace as both off the woman were quite audibly crying.

_What could have caused him to act like that…what did he see when he got taken back? _Rinoa had too many emotions running through her brain and heart to have many clear thoughts. However, after a period of time one clear thought overtook her. _That exchange of words Cid and Squall had…almost as if Cid knew exactly what was going on…Cid is this your fault?_

Immediately, as Rinoa released herself from Selphie's hug forcefully, anger overtook her. It was too much anger to fathom…as if she had all of Squall's anger and hers combined together. _Squall are these your feelings? …_Suddenly, she closed in on Cid, who was leaning against the desk along side Zell and off in his own thoughts. With one hand, she through him down onto the desk as everyone else in the room gasped. With the other, much as her knight had done earlier, she placed it firmly against the Headmaster's throat, pinning him against the desk.

"What the fuck did you do to Squall?" Rinoa screamed, tears running down her face in torrents. "You know something…this is all your fault somehow!"

"Rinoa! Not you too!" Zell yelled, as the rest of the group quickly formed a circle around Rinoa and Cid. Cid managed to speak lightly…as Rinoa's grip was strong but not quite as strong as her knight's.

"Ahhh! …You are no doubt …experiencing Squall's anger through your bond!" Cid managed to force out of his partially constricted windpipe. "Quite a strong grip…similar to Edea's…I experienced a couple times…when I made her angry." Cid managed to chuckle slightly at this as Rinoa released her grip on his neck and backed up from the man, allowing him to sit up on the desk. She was still standing near Cid, eyes full of hate, fighting back a slight urge to send him into the wall with her sorceress magic.

The whole group stood there in silence as Irvine tried to place his hand on Rinoa's shoulder from behind to comfort her. She responded by quickly shaking her shoulders, bucking Irvine's hand from her body.

"You better explain …now!" She yelled, in a tone that took all of her friends, the doctor, and the headmaster by surprise.

Cid spoke, much more clearly this time, as he once again placed his hand against his throat while coughing. " I am very sorry Rinoa….you deserve an explanation…all of you do."

Cid now stood up, as the group spaced themselves out of each other's comfort zone's, waiting for the former knight to continue. Cid looked at the ground before he stopped massaging his neck, now nothing more than a nervous twitch he had. As he looked at the entire group, he began to speak in a lower, more serious tone.

"I do not know what Squall experienced in that dream Rinoa. However, I do know what is bothering him…"

-------------------------------------------

Squall raised himself slightly off a patch of wildflowers and weeds that made a patchwork bed of sorts. With pain still pulsing throughout his head, neck, and back, he tried to soften the pain by rubbing his neck with his hand. He managed to regain complete control of his body and mind as he rose to his feet from the trampled flowers that lay at his feet.

_No! Not again! _He thought to himself as his mind soaked in the environment around him he has saw before. Before he allowed himself to drift off into thought again, he spun his body around forcefully expecting to see the horrible sight before him he had to endure earlier that day.

_What? …How is…this possible? _Squall gazed upon the orphanage in the distance and the flower field before it. Not in flames as it was earlier but peaceful as he heard birds and seagulls in the distance accompanied by the sounds of the waves gently crashing off the shore in the distance.

He was brought out of his thoughts once again as he heard something behind him. He sensed the presence of someone watching him, knowing that she was there, as he spun himself around letting out a gentle scream he only heard.

They stood there staring back at him, Rinoa and…himself? Squall let out a small gasp as he stood frozen in space. The mirror image of himself, holding Rinoa's hand tightly, began to speak.

"I believe we need a moment alone?" The mirror image of himself asked Rinoa as he looked down into her eyes.

"Yes, please…" As soon as Rinoa replied, the mirror image of himself Squall was watching…well, he did look older as his body seemed to have slightly less muscle mass than himself and age marks were apparent on his face…let go of her hand and turned around, walking off into the distance. After walking of a couple of steps, he faded suddenly, disappearing completely.

"How? …What …is…" Was all Squall could muster out as he stared at Rinoa, who now walked up to him, the two now standing only feet apart.

"How is this possible Squall?" Rinoa asked, as Squall noticed this time marks upon her face, blemishes, that could only be caused by time itself. He noticed to himself however, that her body still had its same features…maybe slightly more weight that he hadn't noticed before.

"…y…y…yah…" The reply stumbled out of Squall's mouth.

"Squall, do you remember what Cid said. About how Ultimecia and I would always exist together…in different universes…but together nonetheless."

"Yes…" Squall managed to reply, with more certainty in his voice this time.

"Well this is the other future…our future Squall…what you saw earlier was no doubt Ultimecia's future. However, like Cid told you earlier today…both futures are a possibility."

"I …understand Rinoa." Squall spoke out to her, regret clearly in his voice now. "I was such a dick to you earlier Rinoa I can't believe I-"

"It's okay Squall." Rinoa said, laughing slightly, with a smirk on her face. "I totally understand why you nearly killed Cid in your anger…I would have done the same thing…if I allowed a little bit of my sorceress side to surface you know?" The smirk had blown up into a full smile upon her face.

"It's just…what he said …made me so angry Rin…as if he was playing some sort of sick game with my head." Squall said, with his voice wavering slightly with anger. Rinoa shrugged her shoulders, almost as if to say I'm sorry, before quickly replying to his comment.

"Ultimecia beat me to the punch." Her calm statement caught Squall of guard as he raised his eyebrows in confusion.

"What?"

"Squall, Cid knows all of this because of how he was in the beginning of the cycle you know. He thought that first 'dream' you had was me…not Ultimecia. She managed to beat me to her…from her future…before I could get to you. That's why he was smiling as he said, "So did you have fun?". He thought you were having this chat with me then…not seeing the mind games that Ultimecia was playing with you…trying to ruin us."

_O…Hyne…I fucked up so bad_ …

"It's okay Squall…you both had no idea of what the other meant. It was a common misunderstanding." Rinoa clearly was responding to his thoughts, which didn't surprise Squall a bit.

"I'm so sorry Rin…for what I did to you earlier." Rinoa shrugged again at his statement.

"No hurt feelings Squall…the past is the past right? Well, it's mine at least." She smiled at the young knight before her. "Besides, that never even happened to me."

"What do you mean?"

"Each cycle is different Squall…sometimes Ultimecia decides to be well…the bitch she is…the bitch we can both be…" Rinoa laughed, covering her face for a moment with her hand, before continuing. " …and play mind games with you …literally. You and I have agreed…in the future …well in our future to not go back and try to affect the future. However, when she decides to go back…and try to split us up…I have to go back also and fix what she messed up?"

Squall stood there silently, meeting eyes with the future form of his love, his girlfriend, his sorceress, glancing down for a moment to the hand she was using to emphasize her words, noticing a small golden band on her ring finger.

"Regardless Squall, you must stay strong because in each cycle we are presented with challenges that try to break us apart. You might not realize it Squall, but we almost always make it through with our commitment and love to one another. However, all it took was Ultimecia to win out one time…and now we have to fight her …every time." Rinoa crunched her nose, showing a mad face, that he knew was being both playful with him but dead serious at the same time.

"What challenges Rin? What is going to try to break us apart?" He looked at Rinoa pleadingly, hoping that she would give him news of what they would have to face together in the future.

" I truly…" Rinoa started, with clear sadness on her face in her ineptness to answer her beloved's question,"cannot answer that. Every time it's different…every cycle it's random…but each time it's excrutiatingly hard and tests our limits and our bond Squall. Like I said though, most of the time we make it out of what the world and Ultimecia throw at us and our bond and love is strengthened."

Squall suddenly felt dizzy, almost falling to the ground, as he stumbled trying to regain his focus.

"I'm just hear to warn you Squall. Don't ever give up on us…because I never will."

The dizziness was multiplying, as the flower field and Rinoa began to spin slowly around in his head.

"I'm sending you back now Squall…I'm going to let you rest for a little bit though…you need it badly."

"Rinoa, I…lov-"

"I know Squall, I love you two. I have heard that a few times from you now…and I know you mean it with all you heart…but I really haven't heard that yet Squall. I need it more than ever Squall…for now I know the truth…in the past…and in your present." Rinoa stated, obviously hinting at the fact he kept telling her in their future…but not in their present.

"I understand…" Was the last thing Squall could utter as he lost all focus on her face, and everything else for that matter, as it all went black.

-------------------------------------------

"Why?" Rinoa managed to stammer through her tears. She was sitting on top of a bench in the dormitory commons area, her feet placed into her chest, her hands wrapped around them as her face rested on them. She had told the rest of the group once hearing the news that she wanted to be alone, after they had spent most of the remainder of the day comforting one another, mostly. It was ironic how the pain of the truth she always wanted to know made her heart hurt so much worse than the ignorance bliss she had been in before, with Squall. This statement was not a complete lie, she did not want to be alone, but she didn't want to be with them, she just wanted to be with Squall. She thought to herself that this would never happen…she was to much to deal with for Squall…he had so much responsibilities on his shoulders…he didn't need the future evil sorceresses who would threaten the world and he would kill in his past on his plate as well.

She finally raised her tear-streaked cheeks to look into the sky. She caught to light of a shooting star in the distance in her eyes, which only made the volley of tears which fell down of her face onto her body and the soft soil below come out even harder.

_Squall…I love you…I'm so sorry…for all of this…_

As she continued to stare out into the night sky she had experienced with Squall quite a few times, the sadness overtook her body more.

"Why? …Why!?" She screamed out into the night but was only greeted by silence.

--------

_Damn…my head hurts…_Squall thoughts to himself as he picked himself off the ground and took in his surroundings. To his surprise, the sun was nowhere to be found, as the moon was now out shining of the waves of the oceans in the distance.

_Shit…how long have I been out?! …Rinoa…where are you!?_

Squall immediately took off, running in no particular direction. However, he was sure…he just knew it…he just felt it…that he would find her.

-------------------------------------------

As Squall ran toward the dorm, he knew where he was going, where his heart and body were leading him. As he ran out into the commons area, seeing Rinoa there on that bench, catching her intention as she now met his eyes staring back at him, he felt happiness, sadness, and pain…he knew that these were emotions they both shared…and he was feeling both.

"Rin…" He managed to speak out softly…slightly winded, as he walked up to the bench she was sitting upon. Rinoa rose to her feet, now face to face with her knight as she began to speak.

"Squall…I know the truth…I know why you acted as you did…and I don't blame you the least bit." Squall heart was shot with feeling of pain as he saw how her standing body was trembling before him. The tears that had soaked her face and were still running down her cheeks freely also magnified this pain.

"Rinoa…I'm sorry for the way I acted…I shouldn't have just walked out like that." Squall slowly replied, his pain evident in his voice. More shoots of pain seemed to injected into his body as he watched her unlatch her necklace, take off the Griever ring, place it in her palm, and extend it towards him.

"Squall…" Rinoa said, the trembling and crying that was obvious in her appearance became obvious in her voice. " You acted like you should have…you shouldn't have came back Squall…I am a threat to all of humanity. I can't accept this ring anymore…I can't accept your promise as my boyfriend or knight anymore Squall…" This statement caught Squall by surprise, as tears were now running down his eyes as he choked up as he started to speak.

"Ri…Rin…why?" He stammered out looking at her with pain in his eyes.

"No matter how bad I need you in my life Squall…and it's more than you know…I can't….I can't… burden you with this curse. I can't… burden you with being the knight… of the sorceress that will eventually try to take over the world…who will fail…but try nonetheless.

To her shock, without a word, Squall took the necklace out of her hand close to her body, and his ring out of the hand extended towards him. Next, he slid the ring back on the necklace and reaching around the back of her neck, gently redid the clasp of her necklace. This action caused Rinoa to break out into even heavier sobbing as she looked at Squall.

"Squall! Why…why would you risk…why…why would you even attempt this when you know what I will become." Squall cut Rinoa off with a slightly stern tone, making sure that there was no anger in his voice like the night before outside Selphie's room.

"You won't become Ultimecia…I won't fall you…I won't let you fall…you will remain Rinoa for the rest of our life…I promise you that Rin."

"All of these…these promises Squall. You make willingly to me…how can you Squall …why do you risk it when you know how hard it's going to be…you don't have to…I told you that…I would never expect you too Squall …"

"Without me, you will fall Rinoa. We both know that. Without her knight, any sorceress is bound to fall to her powers eventually."

"I know Squall but if you do we can end this quicker…I won't have to burden you…" Rinoa looked up into his eye's with remorse and pain before she continued. " You can let me fall…and let your gunblade pierce my heart once again like I said before and end this once and-"

"Shut up!" Squall said cutting Rinoa off, catching her by surprise as she immediately closed her mouth and avoided his glance in fear.

Squall then placed his hands on her hips like the night before, this time noticeably firmer, bringing her into him. Not hard or forceful, but more deliberate this time as if he needed her more close more than just wanted her close. Rinoa immediately, instinctively, through her arms around the quickly approaching Squall, meeting her lips to his. She continued to pull him closer to her, Squall now bending his arms, his elbows pressing against her lower back, his hands placed on her shoulder blades, pulling her closer lifting her slightly off the ground. The kiss was so passionate, they both got lost in it, and did not notice the second shooting star that flew by silently in the night. Rinoa couldn't believe this feeling, how a day riddled with heartbreak…. truthfully, major parts of her life riddled with heartbreak…could be washed away but one passionate moment with the man she loved. She seemed to almost melt in his arms, as her entire body seemed to heat up and grow numb with passion.

_Squall…I love you so much…_

After a long moment, the passionate kiss that left them both gasping for air was broken. As they still remained close, their noses still touching slightly, inches removed from their kiss, they stared into one another's eyes. Rinoa managed to ask Squall a question now, as the pain inside her had fully subsided but there were still traces of doubt and fear in her voice.

"Why?" They stared into each other's eyes for a moment after Rinoa's statement, neither flinching nor taking their equally passionate gaze off one another. Finally, Squall found the words, as they came just as naturally as they had already twice that day, fully in confidence, not questioning one syllable.

"Why?" He restated her statement, as Rinoa gave him a barely noticeable nod never taking her eyes off his.

"…Because Rin…I love you…" The moment he said this a calm came over Squall, as he knew everything was going to be perfectly fine just by the way she looked at him. He felt complete, as if the woman he was holding in his arms, the women he loved more than anything in his world, was not a different human being but a extension of himself.

Rinoa felt a rush of passion take hold deep within her. It was as if she had been waiting her entire life to hear Squall say those three words to her. She could tell he did indeed love her by the way he treated her like no one else…the way he protected her…the way he held her…the way he kissed her…the way he looked at her. The list went on and on. However, the words did amazing things for both of them. She realized these words meant just as much to him as they did to her…although they made her feel like she was in heaven…she realized that him saying this to her, whether he knew it or not, proved he was no longer afraid to show his emotions, to get hurt. He was willing to risk his heart, and his life, protecting and being with her, the woman he loved. She clearly stated one thing, looking deeply in his eyes with newly formed tears around hers, before bringing her lips to his once again, fiercely, as if they had not kissed one another in a lifetime.

"Squall…I love you…"

A/N: Plots starts to thicken…more…next chapter….I don't truly know how long this story is going to be…I would say within the range of 15 to 30 chapter but that's rather vague…Regardless, thank you all for reading…Please REVIEW! I would like to know how my first fic EVER is coming along…I hope not to bad…Thanks once again. Trim59


	7. Shock and Awe

I don't own it…I don't…not at all…FFVIII belongs to Square Enix.

A/N: Hey guys, thanks go out to everyone who is still reading this. However, …MAJOR thanks go out to those FEW people who have review it…VERY FEW! It feels very good when a person doesn't just give your story a look…but also decides to at least let you know they like it…or certain parts…or anything at all. I think I might take about a week break…life's busy like always and I'm feeling myself slip out of the writing mood. It comes to a point where I could start writing a chapter every other day or do one a week until I feel like writing more frequently. At least this way…I don't say screw it and quit writing for a period of time.

This chapter thickens the plot, but at the same times, relaxes it a little with a little man bonding and female bonding…I don't know …I think that the contrast between serious parts of the chapter and not necessary but necessary in the sense that no matter who you are you have moments in your life that can seem pointless but can just be just as enjoyable and as noteworthy as life changing one aka the filler parts and the parts where there is some random dialogue, possibly a couple jokes, bonding besides the relationship between Squall and Rinoa…SORRY I am rambling and I totally forget where I was going…oh yah…important parts in this chapter and non important parts …BUT THEY ARE STILL IMPORTANT!!!!

Regardless, you want to read the story not hear me rant …here it is.

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 6

Shock and Awe

A tall man, appearing to be in his late teens, was drifting in and out of thought sprawled across one of three beds in the room. Regardless of the heat that protruded into the room from the open balcony the man still had on his gray trench coat.

_This is a shitty room for 100 gil…fuck it…at least it got cable…_

Once the TV was on the man quickly turned up the volume to drown out the sounds of seagulls and the ocean that bounced into the room from the balcony, nonchalantly flipping through the channels. His attention was quickly gained as he stopped on the news. There was a reporter, a young lady, talking to the viewers with the subtext "SeeD Celebration" on the screen. The man tightened his grip on the remote as he leaned up into a sitting position to better hear what the woman was saying.

"…were comparable to those of the annual SeeD inauguration ball. However, the jubilance that echoed throughout the Balamb Garden two nights ago was by no means comparable to anything seen in recent history. Once again, the SeeD has saved us from a Sorceress threat…from reliable sources, including the President of Esthar, Laguna Loire, and the Headmaster of Balamb Garden himself, Cid Kramer, a threat that was actually in the future! A small group of SeeD's headed the mission they receiver from President Loire, unknown to most of the world at the time. The entire list of members that helped in this mission is unavailable at this time…however, some facts are known about those who participated in the defeat of the Sorceress. We know that the SeeD commander, and hero to all of us, Squall Leonhart led this mission along fellow "A" rank SeeD's Quis-"

Quickly, with enhanced speed thanks to years of physical training, the young man rose from the bed, dropping the remote, drawing his gunblade from its sheath that laid at the foot of his bed. With great force, and flair of finesse and recklessness, the young man smashed his gunblade into the television, not even allowing himself enough time to direct the blade into alignment with the path it was following. More like a baseball bat than prestigious weapon of some of the greatest SeeD's ever, he used his gunblade to send the TV into the far wall, ripping the wires that connected it to the cable and power outlet from the wall behind it.

"That's fucking BULLSHIT! That should be me Squall! I don't care if what I did was wrong! You still…had to ruin everything for me! You…always have…everything I've ever wanted …you've have bettered me at…"

The man stopped the motion of his gunblade, now smashing into small cabinet that the TV was previously upon, creating shattered pieces of wood, metal, and plastic to fly in all directions. He quickly regained his breath, and his anger, as he once again rose his gunblade up before once again assaulting the inanimate object before him and anything that was in his sight.

"…YOU SON OF A BITCH!!! That's supposed to be me Squall! The savior of the world and the valiant knight!"

The man sunk to his knees onto the floor in defeat, physically and emotionally, throwing his gunblade harshly to the floor away from his body. He began to smash his fists into the floor, causing his knuckles and fingers to break, while tears filled with anger ran down his face.

"I was supposed to be the hero Squall! Not the fucking main antagonist in your fucking repulsive….AHHH!!!! FUCK!!!"

"I will never forgive you…you stole everything from me! …My reputation…my woman…my life…my sorceress…my destiny…"

The man fell into silence with a heavy sigh, still on his position on the floor, feeling some relief from the emotional outburst he just had. As he raised his tear-streaked face to the warm sunlight that entered his room from the balcony, a cynical smirk crossed his face.

"I will ruin it Squall…I will ruin you and your little sorceress bitch's little fairytale story and romance…I will ruin it all Squall."

The man found strength deep within from the pact he had just made with himself as he rose to his feet. He felt a presence in the room as he turned his body around.

"Raijin…Fuijin…?"

Instantly, the smirk reappeared on his face, as did the darkness residing deep within his soul, as he stared at the woman before him. In a moments time, he quickly grabbed his gunblade. He then lowered himself onto one knee, his head bowed in respect, as he rested most of his forward leaning weight on his gunblade.

_**Seifer…my knight…**_

-------------------------------------------

"There is…a great place… right downtown in Balamb." The young martial artist directed this statement at his Commander, his friend, as he walked across the patchy grass of the training area. A large T-Rexaur was sprawled onto the training ground floor, blood leaking out from its neck as its head was completely backwards, facing its victorious enemy as he walked towards Squall. As Zell came close to Squall he replaced his knuckle cracking with a nodding of his head.

"Ya know?"

"Zell…it's been almost a week since we have had any alone time." Squall blushed slightly at this statement, surprised with his out rightness and honesty with his friend. "I mean…you know…the little three day vacation Selphie and Rin took to checkup on things in Timber…accompanied by the fact the last week has been crazy with Cid and I taking the trips to Galbadia and Trabia Gardens…helping them get an official rebuilding plan into effect."

"I know what you mean…it's been a long week to say the least…" Zell said his statement half-heartedly. He still was blown away by the way Squall had treated the group of friends and himself the last week. The way he actually…spoke…to them…not just nodded in agreement or said, "Whatever…". It was becoming obvious that he was starting to rely on his friends almost a fraction as much as they relied on their leader, friend, and Commander. It was still hard to believe though…his entire life he was dead to the world and he basically became alive this last week. Damn, what being in love can do to a person, the martial artist thought to himself holding back a cheesy grin.

"I…just don't want to take her to get hot dogs…I mean…your diet of processed meat and soda is questionable at best…but it's especially not…good for you know…"

Zell lost the fight with himself, as now the cheesy grin was on his face and growing by the second.

"A romantic night out?"

Squall replied to this statement by resting one hand on his hip and staring into the ground…old habits die hard after all. After a moment of thought that Zell dared not interrupt, he finally returned his focus to their conversation.

"Yah…I guess…do…ummm…you know any places…that are better…or should I go ask…Irvine…?" Following this comment, Squall actually scrunched his face up in disgust, as if he had ate a really bad hotdog, Zell thought to himself. The two men shared a rare moment, even in the presence of Squall's new outlook and attitude on life, a laugh.

"No…I can actually help you with this. Besides, Irvine would just probably give you directions to the closest and cheapest motel around." Zell said this statement clearly going for another laugh from Squall. The moment had passed however, as the knight only smirked a little at his friend's words.

"There is a real nice place that just opened up not long ago. Actually," Zell remembered, clearly showing excitement at his recollection by pumping his fists and shadow boxing for an instant before continuing. "…It's only a few blocks away from the other place I told you about…towards the direction of the hotel. Also, the place I said before is still a really good second choice. Their hotdogs are amazing…I actually think they are almost better than Garden's!" Zell showed great excitement at this statement, which was not mirrored by Squall, as he continued using his hands for extra emphasis. "You know…if you ever want a slightly more casual-"

Zell was cut off though, as Squall turned around, clearly losing interest in the conversation, and headed for the exit. He rose his hand up above his shoulders facing towards Zell to signal his goodbye.

"Thanks for the help…I'll go try to find out the name and make reservations for tonight. I'll see you later, man."

"Uhhh…yah…see ya …man." Zell statements once again fell out of his mouth at the departing Squall. He wasn't sure if he was more shocked at the use of the word 'man' and use of slang in general by his friend or by the fact that it came so naturally, almost rolled off his tongue, as he might not even had realized that he said that. He managed to regain his thoughts as he yelled towards Squall before heading back into the training area.

"Uhhh…good luck …!"

-------------------------------------------

"I just miss him really bad." Rinoa's face turned into a pout as she directed this to Quistis. "The last time we have had any …you know like alone time…not being like Irvine or anything just saying like any time to ourselves…it's been like a week! And it's been three days since I saw him…he called me but still…"

Rinoa let out a loud sigh as she peered over the instructor's desk to make sure they were not being eavesdropped on. They weren't, she was whispering, loud enough to not be suspicious but quiet enough to keep the conversation safe. Also, all of the student's were absorbed into their computers and the assignment Quistis. Whether or not they were actually doing the assignment or looking at videos on YouTube was unknown. It still caused Rinoa to chuckle a little as to a passerby it would look like the entire class worked diligently out of fear. They all did work, or pretend to work, diligently…only Quistis' friends knew that it was purely out of respect though.

"Ah…the benefits of being an instructor again." Quistis gave her friend a smile as she addressed her laugh. Then her face retook a more serious look as she went back to Rinoa's original statement. " And it has been a busy week…I've restarted teaching, the trip Selphie and you took to Timber, Cid and Squall traveling to the other Gardens, Zell visiting his own family now that we are back by Balamb…and chasing that librarian around….no, stalking that young librarian girl. It has been about a week since we have been together as a group…but we are all back now." Quistis said this to Rinoa with a genuine smile on her face, obviously happy herself that the chaos of the first week after the defeat of Ultimecia was dying down. A moment of uneasiness took in the instructor, as she shuttered remembering their conversation in the infirmary with Cid the week before. Her thoughts quickly became happy though, as they both heard that Squall and Cid got back from Trabia late last night and Cid had given Squall some time off.

"I hope he's not tired…he's going to need all the energy and strength he got." Rinoa's statement slipped out, making both Quistis and her blush, as a shocked look replaced laughter on Quistis' face as Rinoa lowered her face in embarrassment. She held a smile on her face but deep inside frowned at herself for saying that to Quistis, she knew that Squall would not be happy if he heard her say that to one of their friends or anyone at all. Hell, no one would. It was completely true though, as the short time they were apart the last week only deepened her need and want of Squall. It had seemed like an eternity since she felt Squall's lips on hers, felt his hands bring her body closed, and especially since she rested her head on Squall's chest and fell to sleep in his arms like the night that they told each other how they truly felt. Nothing really adult-oriented happened that night between them but it did prove to her how much Squall loved her, as he didn't use those three words and the lack of stability they caused to try anything. Truthfully, Rinoa wished continually for this as they gently kissed on his bed. However, it made her feel special that the first time he had her literally in his bed he didn't act like a guy just wanting sex. In fact, Squall seemed to be unbelievably satisfied, by the smiles that stayed on his face the entire night, just being in her presence and holding her. _Damn Squall_, Rinoa thought to herself, _everything you do makes me feel loved and like I'm special…_

"Rin!" Quistis' voice was now loud enough that it raised a few heads from her class. A smirk appeared on her face as the young instructor was about to continue before Rinoa spoke instead.

"You know! I mean…ummm…for all the Commander duties he got…to…ummm…. perform and-"

A knock on the door stopped Rinoa from speaking, as Quistis, the majority of the students in the classroom, and Rinoa looked at the door. A smile crossed everyone's face as they saw who was at the door, SeeD Commander and hero of the entire world, Squall Leonhart. Squall gave an uneasy smile back clearly feeling the stare of everyone in the room. He gave Quistis a nod and a greeting, she replied with a smile and wave. He followed this moving his finger in a gesture as if to say come here while mouthing the same words. Rinoa smiled as she jumped out of her seat as she met eyes with Quistis and gave her a small frown. Quistis shook her head jokingly as she spoke to Rinoa.

"Go Rin…I only got one more class left…I can manage just fine thanks for the help."

Barely giving Quistis a chance to finish her statement, Rinoa smiled and ran out the door to meet Squall in the hallway.

-------------------------------------------

"I don't understand!" Seifer spat out through clenched teeth, trying to hide his anger, as he rose to his feet. He stepped closer to the sorceress before him, looking slightly down to meet eyes with Ultimecia, anger and pleading mixed in his eyes. "My sorceress…I can beat him!!! Just give me a chance!"

_**You had your chance…you had many chances…and you failed me…are you going to let them kill me again?!**_

Seifer's pleading eyes remained on Ultimecia, as he stepped back slightly in fear at the expression on the sorceress' face.

"No! …I won't let them hurt you again…I am your knight! I just…I'm stronger now…"

_**And so is he! You still don't understand you foolish boy! You cannot defeat him…no one can…you never could! He is just too strong…there is only one way to defeat him………..only one way…………**_

The fact of Ultimecia's statements hurt Seifer, his face scrunching up in anger as he felt his eyes start to itch as he held back tears. He wasn't sure if the betrayal of his own sorceress' words hurt more…or the fact he knew they were true. Regardless, in his fear, anger, and a deep wanting to defeat the man he hated more than anything…by any means necessary, he swallowed his pride as he spoke.

"Y…y…. you are …right…. you are completely right. Tell me what I must do to defeat him my sorceress."

_**He's too strong to defeat by normal means…training and the events of his life have hardened him physically, mentally, and emotionally…he is almost impervious to anything we try to do to him. There is no way you can hurt him physically…but he does have…….. one weakness…..**_

"Rinoa!" Seifer spat out in shock, realizing what Ultimecia was getting at. "…Please…tell me what I must do…"

_**You and your…friends…must go to Galbadia immediately…I will tell you where to go once you get there. I have followers…fear is a powerful weapon and there are those that would rather obey blindly in fear than die…soldier, politicians, and military engineers……**_

"…" Seifer nodded in anticipation as to what she would say next.

_**I am sure you did not know that some Galbadia's militaries brightest engineers are much more adapt at their craft than even those of Esthar…and even though Galbadia…is no where near as technologically advanced as Esthar…Galbadia does have…some technology that is even more advanced …beyond Esthar's wildest imagination…**_

" Please! Just tell me-"

_**Silence! As I said before…no one can defeat this man by normal means…you must have him defeat….himself…..now go!**_

"Please…I don't under-"

_**Go! You will find out soon enough my knight…everything is ready…you must go and set these plans into motion immediately…now go…**_

Raijin and Fuijin were shocked at what they saw as they entered the room. To their surprise, their friend stood there almost in a daze, nodding to them…and then to the familiar woman that was standing before him, before she faded away into thin air, leaving a black smoke in her wake for a moment.

"At once…my sorceress…"

-------------------------------------------

"This is stupid!" Rinoa pouted, stomping her right foot repeatedly on the ground, fully in spoiled princess mode. She aimed her comment riddled with stubbornness to a semi-irritated Selphie, who stood peering into the dressing room at Rinoa when she opened the door and started throwing a fit, and vice versa. "I don't like this color," Rinoa started, using her thumb to grab one strap of the light yellow dress that hung on her shoulders, low on her hips, and high on her chest, as she tilted her head scrunching her face up as if she was actually about to cry, still stomping her foot. "…and it doesn't fit right! Why can't I just wear the white one in my closet?!" At the end of her statement, Rinoa quit stomping her foot and playing with the straps of the dress, as she stood still, arms firmly at her sides, as she made her face into the biggest pout possible looking at Selphie, letting out a big sigh.

Selphie responded to this by placing both hands on her hips and letting out a equally loud sigh. We all love Rinny, but, she can REALLY act like a spoiled brat sometimes, Selphie thought to herself. At this statement to herself, the light hearted girl looked back on the situation and found humor in Rinoa stomping her foot into the ground like a 7 year old child when her parents wouldn't let her have the new toy she wanted.

"Rinny!" Selphie held back her laughter, as this seemed to sadden her friend even more. "Squall has already seen you in that dress…that's the ONLY dress he has seen you in! And tonight is your first OFFICIAL date…and he's taking you out to a fancy restaurant…so you know you don't want to…."

Rinoa's expression quickly became pensive, as if she was still upset but became worried, unsure of herself, and scared at the same time. Her eyebrows rose up and her mouth fell slightly agape.

"No don't get me wrong," Selphie started to reassure her friend, "it's a nice and really really really pretty dress. We are just going for the shock and awe effect here. Take him totally by surprise! Make him look at you and just be like…DAMN!…you know?…" This comment caused Rinoa to blush and smirk at the same exact moment.

Rinoa's thoughts drifted off as her friend took her by the shoulder, leading her back towards the dresses in hopes of finding the right one, Rinoa still wearing the Selphi-esque dress.

"Shock …and awe?" Rinoa asked her friend with suspicion and confusion in her eyes as she looked at her friend.

Selphie nodded her head as a dress caught her attention. She immediately pulled a deep blue, almost black, strapless dress off the rack. It had unknown material in it that reflected the lighting of the store, making it give off a glow as it reflected all the light back towards the source. This dress caused both of the girls to smile, as the girl with hair parted to each side of her head stared at the girl with long flowing hair that went down towards the middle of her back. Rinoa's smiled doubled that of the one on Selphie's face, if that was possible, as Rinoa mimicked the nod that was causing Selphie's head to bobble up and down.

"Shock and awe"

A/N: Hey relatively short chapter I know sorry…I was thinking about having a one or two more "scenes" or whatever you call them…but the next one or two more scenes I think are going to make a chapter by themselves. Besides, I would rather make a slightly short chapter and make it easy on you guys instead of painful on you with a overly LONG chapter so yah! Listen….serious time….I LIKE REVIEWS and I don't get any (starts crying…sounds something like huh huh huhuh huh huh huh) it's good motivation to keep writing when I get reviews and this is like the second or third time I have said REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW at the end of a chapter and what do you guys do? Not review that's what…it's not nice…it's not very nice at all. How would you like it if I stopped writing unless you review huh? Yah! I bet you wouldn't like that much huh…just like I don't like not getting reviews…it makes me sad…and this stupid rambling at the end of chapters might be better and more entertaining than the story itself and the reason you don't review so maybe I will quit doing this and to ultimately answer my question maybe you guys don't review so I stop writing (cries louder this time, HUH HUH HUH HUH!)

Rambling with no clear point I know sorry….by the way….it's kind of late and I have drank a LOT of coffee so that's a big cause for my ridiculous rambling of the last paragraph sorry!!!

P.S. Please review


	8. Plotting the Fall

I do not own Final Fantasy VIII …it belongs to Square Enix

I do not own Final Fantasy VIII …it belongs to Square Enix.

A/N: It's been a while, sorry to keep you all waiting. Been real busy with track meets and invitationals. Hope you enjoy this chapter…Trim59.

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 7

Plotting the Fall

As the morning sun shone through Squall's window waking the young Commander he felt a tingling numbness in his left shoulder. A strong flinch from Squall almost woke Rinoa, her body cuddled tightly against Squall's with her head resting on his chest. He relaxed as the previous night's events washed over him. Most of all, the thoughts of how amazing Rinoa looked in her deep blue dress that accented Squall's SeeD uniform nicely. It was an extremely romantic evening that took Squall and Rinoa both by surprise. They shared a dinner at Romero's, the 4 star restaurant that Zell had mentioned to Squall. Then, thanks to the nice summer air, they decided to walk back to Garden taking a small detour along the beach, even managing to avoid monsters. Squall managed to work up the courage to ask Rinoa to come into his dorm during their hour long walk back. They stayed up past 2 in the morning talking. There was no discussion about sorceresses or knights, of any kind.

Passion had gotten the better the young couple the previous night and Squall was feeling the effects as he stared at a peaceful Rinoa, dressed in a loose fitting t-shirt and pair of shorts that belonged to Squall, still looking feminine and attractive all the while, as he managed a yawn. The couple hadn't gone all the way, they both wanted to take their time with their feelings, emotional and physical, as they got better control of the mental bond the shared. Regardless, they still enjoyed exploring one another in a physical sense that they were both comfortable with, which was increasing at a surprising rate. When the two finally decided to get some sleep for the night Rinoa's self conscious got the best of her as she decided to adorn some of Squall's clothes to bed instead of her bra and underwear.

Squall continued to absorb in all of Rinoa's features as he laid there beside her. He was caught off guard when he returned his gaze back to her face after taking in a long look if the rest of her body as Rinoa's deep brown eyes and comforting smile were greeting him. Slowly, but with decisiveness, she leaned in to share a kiss with her knight.

"Morning…"

Squall stared at Rinoa for a few seconds, sharing a genuine smile with her, before replying.

"Morning…"

--

Seifer eye's held hatred as he stared down slightly meeting eyes with his rival. Both men had their arms slightly to the sides, Seifer fully extending his Hyperion gunblade, almost touching the ground with it. Mirroring him, Squall had his Lion Heart fully extended to his side a few inches off the ground. Seifer's look of hatred grew, fully bearing his gritted teeth. Finally, he broke eye contact, sheathing his weapon, and looked over to the group of scientists, engineers, Raijin, and Fuijin.

"He makes me sick just looking at him. His boy band good looks, that cocky ass half-smirk…it's fucking perfect!"

Seifer walked towards the group as the lead scientist, looking quite pleased with himself, walked up to Seifer meeting him halfway.

"Sir, like I said, it is an exact replica of the one you call Squall Leonhart. I take it you are pleased?"

Seifer replied with a smirk, however, there was still some anger in his facial expressions.

"Yes, I am…however, I do wonder. He passes the physical test with flying colors: the mannerisms, the voice, the body gestures, the personality, everything. However…I know you have received all the information from the Sorceress, but only the Sorceress and I have been defeated in battle by Leonhart."

Seifer's expressions were now full of hatred and anger once again, his smirk still presently but a secondary feature.

" I am sure you would have no complaints if I gave him a little test run?"

The lead engineer's nod of approval sent a rush of energy cursing through the fallen knight. Quickly, he drew his weapon and walked towards the scientist's version of Squall with a restored swagger in his step. As he pointed his Hyperion weapon towards the android Squall, falling into his battle position, the android swiftly, fluidly, and with much skill raised his weapon and fell into an identical version of Squall's battle stance, Lion Heart across his chest at a slight angle with both hands placed firmly on the trigger.

"Come on bitch, let me show you who you're fucking with!"

--

"Good morning, lovers!" Irvine yelled across the cafeteria at an approaching Squall and Rinoa, gaining the attention of more than half the students present. By the time the blushing couple reached the table the rest of their group had silenced Irvine, still holding smirks on all their faces.

Hastily, to avoid drawing further attention to themselves, Squall and Rinoa both tried to seat themselves in chairs right by one another at their table, almost running to their chairs when within arms reach. To their dismay, they both tried to go to the inside of the two chairs, hitting into one another. Rinoa, who managed to slide in front of Squall with her much narrower frame, was sent forward, bumping into the table hard. She managed to catch herself by placing both her hands firmly against the table, her body leaning way into the table as strands of her hair fell into her face. Squall, with agility gained from his training, managed to direct his momentum forward as well to avoid crashing into or through either chair. Almost smashing into Rinoa's rear, Squall caught himself with one hand against the table as his other hand limply ended up wrapping halfway around Rinoa's midsection. Both let out a loud groan as they stopped their momentum suddenly, sending the table skidding about half a foot across the floor.

The whole table let out chuckles and blushed as their two friends were in an extremely compromising position. As the two regained their balance, quickly trying to take their seats, Zell couldn't let the progressively funnier situation slip by without a remark.

"Hey, damn, didn't you guys get enough of each other last night?"

Quistis tried to reprimand Zell, failing miserably as her laughter got the better of her. Selphie had the same intents as Quistis but followed suit, laughing hysterically at the flustered and embarrassed couple.

Once again, by trying to avoid further embarrassment, Squall and Rinoa's haste added to the hilarity of the situation. They both aimed their bodies for the same spot once again, Squall plopping down into the left most chair, Rinoa plopping down milliseconds after into his lap accidentally. As if she had sat on a needle, a deep blush covering her entire face, Rinoa jumped up from the seat and quickly took her seat a little more than a foot to Squall's right.

Rinoa tried to keep a straight face. However, within seconds she was laughing along with the entire group. The group's laughter died out however, quickly, as they all became aware of Squall. Sitting there, Squall had a stone sour look on his face as if he just witnessed his puppy get put down, a blush twice as profound as Rinoa's adorning his face. Slowly, his face turned into a scowl, bottom lip slightly quivering with embarrassment and anger.

Uneasiness rose in the group as they fell silent, all directly or indirectly staring at Squall, holding their breath. Thankfully, the events of the last few months had changed Squall. The whole group silently exhaled in relief as Squall's scowl disappeared in exchange for his usual, "I don't want to be here," look. The entire group, and the large amount of students that were secretly watching the scene among the friends, couldn't believe what happened next.

Squall locked eyes with Zell, making him slowly scoot his chair back slowly, as his chest began to slowly rise and fall quickly as if he was about to attack. However, no attack followed. Squall tried to hold back a smirk across his face as he let loose what he was holding in his chest. It started off quiet, but quickly grew in volume, as his laugher had the entire cafeteria staring at him in utter disbelief.

--

The ex-Disciplinary Committee were all present in a Galbadian military helicopter, exact copies of the helicopter following closely behind in the sky by the tens and twenties. Seifer was standing near the open door of the chopper, his left hand placed against the roof for support. Raijin had to shout to gain the attention of Seifer over the loud sound of the vehicles engine.

"Yo, Seifer? You sure this plans going to work, man?!"

Seifer peered over his left shoulder towards where Raijin and Fuijin were sitting, his lower lip busted and cut deeply. He looked down momentarily at the deep wound across his abdomen, which was still bleeding through his shirt, placed his free hand over the wound, and looked over his shoulder once more.

"I know it will…he's just as strong as Squall."

Raijin once again gained Seifer's attention.

"Yo, he is almost as strong as the real deal, man…but how do you know he's going to take the real Squall one on one? Especially with his whole groups of friends man!"

"Even if he isn't quite as strong as the real Squall, he can take out the rest of Squall's group by himself. Leave the worrying about Squall to me. I got a plan."

"Yo, but man, he is so strong! I just don't know how…"

Raijin lowered his head without even finishing his statement. He raised his head to meet eyes with Seifer as he walked across the inside of the military vehicle and placed his hand on his shoulder. Gracefully, with his other hand still placed over the gash on his stomach, he bent down on his knees until he was eye level with Raijin.

"Don't worry…even Achilles had a heel."

--

Gently, Squall placed his forehead against Rinoa's. Irvine and Selphie walked away a few paces and turned their backs to give the couple some privacy, not to mention to give themselves some privacy. In fact, Irvine and Selphie were to busy quietly making out to be aware of Squall and Rinoa.

"Squall, I love you."

"I love you too."

Rinoa smiled at Squall, the couple only separated by a few inches, both of her hands folded up and resting on his chest.

"More than the world?"

Squall, who at one time in his life never smiled, smiled almost instinctively as he once again placed his head against Rinoa's, both hands cupping her neck. He shook his head in agreement before speaking.

"Rin-"

Rinoa wouldn't let him finish as she cut him off.

"Squall, you are my world."

Gently, Rinoa mirrored Squall, placing both of her hands on his neck, leaning in for a deep passionate kiss.

Almost at the same time, both couples said their goodbyes, unaware of one another, Selphie and Rinoa entering Selphie's dorm and the men beginning their walk towards their own rooms. Halfway down the hall, Irvine rubbed his neck before speaking to Squall.

"You know, buddy, if she's not staying with you because of the jokes we all cracked earlier, I'm sorry. I know you guys didn't really have sex…regardless, you two are extremely close and in a very serious relationship and-"

Squall looked at his friend and gave him a smile, his way of accepting the apology, before cutting his friend off.

"Thanks, but, it's no big deal. I already talked to Cid and given our situation, how much he likes all of us, and the fact he giving Rinoa SeeD status for her help, he will have a dorm ready for us to share in about a week. Until then, regardless of my personal life, I am SeeD Commander and I have to follow protocol."

Squall shrugged at Irvine, before diverging from Irvine towards him dorm. His final comment had both SeeD's sharing a small laugh before they parted ways.

"Besides, I think I'll be safe by myself...I can manage for a week or so."

--

A gust sent the windows in Squall's room slamming up against where they were latched, waking the teenage knight. With a grunt, a half-asleep Squall slowly got up from out of his bed and closed the windows.

"What the hell, I thought I closed them…"

Suddenly, Squall sensed someone behind with his keen senses. Foolishly, for some odd reason, he thought it was Rinoa. He turned around nonchalantly with a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. His mouth dropped open, it was as it was as if he was staring into a mirror. Squall dropped both hands to his sides in awe as an exact replica of himself was standing before him. Quickly, Squall started to turn around, his gunblade was perched up against the side of his bed. Before he had a chance to grab his weapon, he felt a sharp pain on the back of his head that sent him to the floor as everything went black.

--

He wasn't sure if it was the pain in his head, or the pain in his shoulder, regardless, pain brought Squall back from his unconscious state, his head throbbing as he felt every pump of blood his heart sent throughout his body. Everything was out of focus as he slowly came to realize that his hands were chained above his head. Upon letting his head fall limply down, he saw his legs were also incapacitated. Instantly, he felt sickness in his stomach with a twinge of fear as he remembered a memory he tried to block out, D-District Prison. Finally, everything started to focus and he was shocked to find out that he was in a similar situation from his earlier stint with torture, except he was in a much smaller room with better conditions. Panic started to flow through his body, Squall beginning to struggle against his confines as he looked around the room. The only things in the room were a door, over half a dozen large televisions, and a large machine he recognized from D-District as his source of agony in the corner of the room, hooked up to the contraption he was chained to. It felt as if his every one of his organs was about to come up through his throat as he saw a man dressed in a large grey trench coat walk nonchalantly into the room, Seifer.

"You son of a bitch! Seifer, what the fuck is this?!"

Seifer, upon stopping about ten feet short of Squall's position up on the wall, pressed his hand against his head, covering his scar, and let out a sinister laugh. As a Galbadia soldier walked behind Seifer and took his place at the controls of the torture machine Squall knew all to well, Seifer finally replied to Squall's outburst.

"Ahh, brings back old memories doesn't it bitch?"

As the soldier started to press random buttons on the machine, Squall fought hard against his chains.

"Seifer, what the hell are you trying to do?!"

With a smirk on his face, Seifer walked up to where Squall was chained, throwing a hard uppercut into his ribs that sent him painful vibrations all throughout his body. Squall attempted to spit at Seifer, missing, but antagonizing Seifer into throwing another hard punch into Squall's ribs.

"Seifer, what the fuck do you want? Motherfucker, answer me?!"

Finally, Seifer began to pace across the room as he filled Squall in on his plan with a wide smile.

"What am I trying to do? What do I want? Well, let's see Squall; that changes quite frequently. In our earlier days, I wanted to embarrass you, make you feel inferior. …Then, you started to get strong, even stronger than me…and I wanted to hurt you…I did…but you hurt me too…"

Seifer stopped to point at his scar for effect before continuing.

"Then, let's see, I don't know…somewhere around stealing my fucking girl, ruining my fucking life, and becoming a fucking hero all around the world for doing what I always dreamed off…I wanted to fucking kill you!"

Squall exploded at Seifer's insults, fighting so hard against his chains his wrists and ankles started to bleed.

"Don't blame me because your fucking romantic dream didn't play out the way you wanted it to! I swear to Hyne you son of a-"

Once again, Seifer threw a hard uppercut into Squall's gut in anger, making Squall spit out a little blood.

"You know what you cocky son of a bitch!? You want to hear what you have wanted to all your fucking life?!"

Again, Seifer smashed his fists into Squall's bruised ribs until a trickle of blood was coming out of his mouth.

"Your better than me, your stronger, you got the girl, I can't beat you. And like I said what I want changes frequently. You have no idea how easy it would be to kill you right now, to chop you up like fucking lunchmeat! But I don't want that anymore, no, no, no, …haha…I want to see you suffer! I want to see everything you cherish in this world destroyed and laying in ruin at your feet…I want you groveling at my feet…in defeat…and then I'll fucking kill you! Once…everything in this world you love…is no more…"

Squall continued to squirm against his confines, with anger and passion that he lacked before when he realized Seifer's intent.

" I swear to Hyne, Seifer, If you fucking lay a finger on Rinoa I'll fucking kill you! I will fucking kill-"

Squall stopped all forms of resistance as his opposite self walked into the room, taking a place right beside Seifer. Squall addressed Seifer, now almost pleading.

"No, please, don't. …What are you going to do?"

Seifer laughed, pulling out a small remote control, pressing a few buttons that turned on all the TV's, one of which was a first person view of the replica of Squall, staring right at him, chained up against the wall.

"Squall…you already know what I'm going to do…basically. But in more detail, little Squall look a like right here is going to go take your place at Garden for a little bit. I don't know, he's going to ruin everything you got…he's going to break that bitches heart, wage a little war on Garden, then he's going to kill everybody and everything you hold dear, and everything you don't …just for good measure. You are going to see it all, sit back you son of a bitch, cause you got a front row fucking seat."

He walked up to Squall and threw one land punch crashing into his torso out of hatred and spite before taking his place back in the center of the room.

"That's my fucking great ass plan in a nut shell…but I can't help but to think I'm forgetting something. Damn…what was it…? Oh yah, once Rinoa thinks that her little pillar of strength, you, is gone…has betrayed her and all her friends…she's going to turn…and I will have my Sorceress…and I will have my romantic dream."

Seifer recognized the fear in Squall's eyes and couldn't help but to smile even more.

"You didn't think I knew? Oh my, come on Squall! You always were the smart one…don't be that fucking naïve."

With a quick flip of his arm towards the soldier against the wall, Squall's whole body screamed with pain as thousands upon thousands of volts of electricity passed through it. Finally, like a conductor of a marching band, Seifer threw his hand down hard to his side and with a loud thud of the machine's lever being thrown back to off, the gut wrenching pain subsided. With what little strength he had, Squall managed to look deep into Seifer's eyes that were glazed over with rage and hate. Seifer spoke over the loud groans of pain Squall's body spat out, through gritted teeth.

"Oh yah bitch, I always get the girl…"

A/N: Review, please. Let me know what you think.


	9. A Nightmare

I don't own Final Fantasy VIII or anything having to do with it

A/N: Been a while since I wrote last, over two months actually, sorry. Been busy and haven't really had the time. Anyways, I leave for basic training in 3 weeks so I am going to try like hell to finish this first fanfic of mine (crosses fingers). I'm finally starting to get some reviews, thank you, keep them coming. Without further ado, here's the next chapter.

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 8

A Nightmare

It was difficult for Rinoa to stand on her own two feet, the warm water cascading down her back making Rinoa, already half asleep, even more drowsy. Closing her eyes as the water poured over her face, Rinoa crossed her hands over her chest, giving herself a neck massage.

She couldn't understand, it was a little past 4 in the morning and her entire body felt like a truck hit her. She was moderately worried by the pain in her midsection that made it hard to breathe, as if a professional boxer got done minutes before using her stomach as a heavy bag.

What's wrong with me? I trained some today but not more than I am used to…

She dried herself off from her shower and made her way back to her bed, Selphie's couch. After flopping down, Rinoa hugged her pillow and tucked her knees up until she was in the fetal position, her body still aching. From about 2 to 3:30 A.M., Rinoa looking at the clock on the VCR across the room every few minutes, what started as soreness preventing her from sleeping evolved into aching muscles and pain.

Her plan to take a shower and feel better failed, miserably. Frustrated, after a couple minutes of trying to fall asleep, Rinoa glanced over at the red numbers that glowed in the darkness of the room.

4:24

Squall was always on Rinoa's mind somewhat and she thought about him most of the time she wasn't with him. Once again, Squall was brought back into Rinoa's thought as she realized the clock read his birthday, April 24th.

Maybe I should go get Squall and tell him I feel really bad. …No, he would probably be really angry…

With a deep sigh, Rinoa squeezed the pillow against her chest twice as hard, pretending it was Squall, and closed her eyes, trying to fall asleep.

--

Squall refused to scream as the electricity cursing through his body made his skin feel warm enough it could combust at any moment; Seifer would enjoy it too much. He closed his eyes, only allowing a low moan of pain to escape his lips. Squall tried to use some of the advanced training they received at Garden, training on how to separate your mind from your body in a torture situation so you wouldn't give into the enemies' request. It worked much better when tens of thousands of volts of electricity weren't running through you body.

Squall heard the door opened, followed by Seifer saying, "Enough." Next, the pain that was echoing throughout his body ceased. Squall opened his eyes, trying to see who entered the room, but his vision was blurred. After a few seconds of trying to focus his eyes, Squall could make the figure out as a blonde woman, in a Galbadian military outfit, standing at attention, saluting Seifer. She was dressed all in black; Squall knew this meant she was an officer in the G-military.

Seifer nonchalantly saluted the female officer and she stood at attention before speaking.

"Sir, it is 0800 hours, should we proceed with the operation?"

Seifer looked over his shoulder towards Squall's position on the wall. Once he noticed Squall was returning his glance, blood still coming out both corners of his mouth, he smirked.

"Time sure does fly when you having fun, eh Squall? Yes, proceed at once."

Without a word, similar to the time he spent next to Seifer during the torture of Squall, the Squall duplicate followed the female officer towards the door.

"Squall?"

Squall raised his head he allowed to hang at Seifer's address. However, the other Squall turned around. Seifer walked up the Squall duplicate until he was inches away and peering down at him, the grimace on his face making it clear he didn't like this Squall much more than he liked the original.

"You know the plans?"

The doppelganger nodded and gave Seifer the official SeeD salute.

"Yes, sir."

The words that came out of his duplicate caused shivers to run down Squall's spine, his voice was the same mirror image as was his other characteristics of the man he was modeled after.

Seifer waited for them to leave the room, standing silently until the door closed behind them. He reached his hand into his pocket and pulled out the remote that controlled all the televisions in the room. Casually, he began to throw it up in the air and allow it to flip a few times before grabbing it out of freefall. He couldn't hold back the sinister smirk that covered his face from ear to ear as he looked at Squall.

"Squall, it's almost time to start the show."

--

The pain had mostly subsided since the previous night but Rinoa still had a little trouble keeping her breath, her ribs feeling as if they were badly bruised, as she made her way down the dormitory hall and exchanged waves and greeting with SeeD and students that passed her in the hall. She was finally starting to feel comfortable at Garden and her charming and pleasant personality made her a well-liked permanent guest at Garden among its residents.

Rinoa forgot about the nagging pain in her side as she felt a rush of excitement and happiness as she could see Squall's door that she was quickly approaching. Before knocking, she brushed the wrinkles out of her tight black shirt and tight pants. Quickly, she shot her hand up and knocked softly on the door. She waited for a few seconds and she didn't hear any footsteps coming towards the door. Rinoa brushed a few strains of hair that fell down over her face away and knocked again, slightly louder. Again, she didn't hear any footsteps but she thought she could hear someone awake in Squall's dorm.

Rinoa knocked a third time, loud enough that she knew it was heard from within. A split second after knocking she put her ear against the door. She heard a loud and agitated sigh, Squall. She smiled as she heard Squall and giggled softly to herself, knowing Squall would be irritated for the first few minutes because she woke him up. Rinoa almost pushed her head through the door as she thought she heard a female voice giggle.

Haha yeah right…Squall with another girl…that would never happen…

Still, even though Rinoa knew that she couldn't have heard what she thought she heard, she was still curious as to what the sound was. Again, louder this time, Rinoa heard a girl giggle, followed by her letting out a short, quiet, shrill followed by laughter. Rinoa stepped back from the door a few feet as if it was giving off an immense heat. After a moment of shock and disbelief, she shoved her hand into her jean pocket looking for the spare key to Squall's dorm.

_I don't know why I'm doing this, he told me he would answer the door if he heard a knock, always. He hates_ _coming in and waking him up and I know he's not in there with another girl so…I should just knock again. I'll knock again._

Rinoa gulped and started to put the key back into her pocket with her left hand while leaning in to knock with her right. However, another sound, this time what sounded like a female talking, caused Rinoa to abandon her intended action, now trying to shove the spare key in the lock as quickly as possible with trembling hands. As the door opened Rinoa called into his room as she stepped through the doorway.

"Squall?"

She took a few more steps, now able to see the right third of Squall's bedroom where his office desk was located through the open door. She reached her hand back, refusing to take her eyes off of the area of Squall's dorm where she heard noises coming from, and pushed the door shut. After Rinoa took a few more steps, the door finally slammed with a noise that seemed to echo throughout the entire dorm.

Quickly, Squall appeared in Rinoa's line of sight as he jumped off the bed, only wearing white boxer briefs. Squall shot his hands to his sides, trying to act surprised but Rinoa saw right through his act, he was nervous and scared. Quickly, Squall walked up to Rinoa, trying to block her view of the bedroom.

"Uh, hi."

Rinoa tilted her head to one side, hurt and angry but not trying to make her emotions apparent, still holding onto the false hope that she didn't hear a girl. As calmly as possible, with a trembling voice that held sadness she spoke.

"Squall, what's going on?"

Squall looked around the room, finally making eye contact with a face that was guilty.

"Look, Rin, I-"

Chills ran down Rinoa's spine as she heard the voice she heard before come directly from behind Squall.

"Baby, what's going on?"

--

"I will fucking kill you, I will fucking kill you!"

Seifer turned around to look at Squall. His face was as completely serious as possible.

"Will you shut the fuck up!? It's getting good!"

Squall lashed against his chain, trying to break out, with as much force as he could muster. The chains cutting deep into Squall's skin only further enraged Squall as he continued fighting against his entrapment.

"You sick son of a bitch! I'll fucking kill you!"

Screaming, Seifer pointed at the guard that was standing against the wall.

"Guard!"

Without a moments hesitation, the guard flipped a few switches and sent a shorter, but much more powerful, shock of electricity through his body, causing Squall to go limp. The punishment took away most of Squall's anger. However, he still managed to glare at Seifer with hatred. Aggravated, Seifer closed the distance between Squall and himself in a flash. Seifer, now close enough that the saliva that flew out of his mouth actually landed on Squall's chest, as Squall was over two feet off the ground, crunched his nose up as he scowled up at Squall.

Seifer shot his hand up, slamming Squall's head off the steel wall behind him as he wrapped his fingers around his hated rival's throat.

"There…is nothing you can fucking do! Shut the fuck up…and watch!"

--

The female voice that came from behind Squall overlapped his words. However, every word was heard clearly by Rinoa. She refused to look at the figure that appeared beside Squall, whom Rinoa could see out of her peripherals was staring back, initially. Instead, she stared at Squall, projecting a hundred different emotions through her eyes and facial expressions to Squall, hurt and sadness most obvious as tears formed at the corners of her eyes. Squall didn't project much of anything, at least not anything that Rinoa project, as he hung his head to one side.

Finally, Rinoa managed to move her eyes about three feet to the left of Squall. The tears started to fall as she saw the girl that was in his room, giggling, all this time, a petite attractive blonde female who was completely naked, covering herself with articles of clothing she held with her hands over her most private areas. The girl stuttered, clearly nervous and seemingly unaware of whom Rinoa was.

"Um, hi, I'm Mary."

Rinoa spat back, anger and sadness flowing out of her mouth along with words, her voice cracking as she fought to get the words out without breaking down.

"Hi, I'm Rinoa, Squall's girlfriend!"

Instantly, Mary exposed herself fully to Rinoa, as she quickly put on her clothes sloppily, uttering apologies to Rinoa. Squall and Rinoa both stood there without a sound, Rinoa taking turns glaring at Squall and Mary. Once her clothes were on, Mary gave Rinoa a genuinely sorry looking frown.

"I should go."

Again, Rinoa spat out her words towards Mary.

"Yeah, you should do that."

Squall reached his hands and placed it on Mary's shoulder, Rinoa's mouth falling open at this as it happened a few feet in front of her.

"Wait, baby, don't go."

"I got to go."

Mary actually broke out into a jog as she got to the door, opened it, and slammed it behind her. Rinoa looked over her shoulder, towards the dorm door that she desperately wanted to run out of also, refusing to look at Squall. Squall called out to Rinoa, his voice seemingly oddly calm.

"Rin."

Rinoa spun her head around, then spun it back around towards the door, then back to Squall as she pointed towards the door.

"Baby? …Squall, how could you?"

Rinoa's voice came out barely more than a whisper as she held the sobs back in her throat much better than the tears that were pouring down her face. On the other hand, Squall's voice came out calm and collected, as if he had already planned the conversation he was now having.

"Look, Rin, I didn't mean it to happen this way."

Rinoa's voice still came out a loud whisper, but now it held bitterness as well.

"Happen what way Squall? For your girlfriend to come over to your dorm room in the morning to give you a morning kiss, tell you she loves you, and show you some affection, only to find out your already doing that with some…some fucking whore Squall?!"

Rinoa's voice that started out small rose into a full out scream at the end, causing Squall to place his hands on her shoulders to calm her down. With one swift flail of her arm, Rinoa's slapped both of Squall's arms off of her shoulders.

"Don't fucking touch me Squall! You'll be lucky if I ever let you touch me again!"

Rinoa continued to glare at Squall through bloodshot eyes. Squall inhaled deeply with a serious look on his face as Rinoa continued, placing her hand over her chest.

"Do you have any idea how much of a toll this is going to take on our relationship?! Squall, I love you, but I don't think I can forgive you for this!"

Rinoa stopped and brushed away tears. She tilted her heads and spoke again, soft and barely above a whisper like before.

"Well, what the hell do you have to say Squall?"

Squall placed both hands on his hips, as he drifted off into deep thought as he frequently would when they first met.

"Squall! What do you have to say?"

Squall looked at Rinoa, and then opted to turn around. In former Squall fashion, Squall started talking by throwing his one hand up by his head like he would do when he was irritated or annoyed. Squall's voice came out soft like Rinoa's, but it was rigid and lacked all of the emotion Rinoa's had.

"Rinoa, I don't want you to forgive me, I meant to tell you but I didn't know what time was right."

Rinoa choked on a lump in her throat at Squall's words, her voice cracking as it came out in a squeak.

"Wha…what do you mean Squall?"

Squall turned around and stared at Rinoa with a face that held no emotion.

"I don't want to be with you anymore, I don't love you."

Rinoa wrapped her arms around her waist as her sobbing shook her entire body. She tried to speak, but failed miserably. She continued sobbing as she looked as Squall, bending over at her waist slightly as the sobs riddled her body. When she managed to form words she replied to Squall, sadness the only emotion remaining in her voice.

"What do you mean Squall? You don't just fall out of love with someone overnight, what did I do wrong?"

Squall, obviously irritated, spat back at Rinoa with anger in his voice.

"You didn't do anything wrong, I just …never loved you."

"Squall, what do you mean?"

Again, Squall replied brashly, rubbing his head in frustration.

"I don't want this, any of this. I don't want this guilt, the guilt that I have to stay with you because you need me as …your pillar of strength to fight off the evil within you. I'm not obligated to be with you and I don't want to be with you."

Rinoa felt like all of a sudden she had no reason to live, Squall turning away from her once again. She hoped that she would wake up at any minute, she hoped it was all just a horrible nightmare, she hoped she would wake up in Squall's arms and he would hold her and tell her everything was alright. She knew this was a nightmare, but it wasn't a dream. Desperately, as if she was trying to hold onto the most important thing in the world, even though he was the most important thing in the world to her, she closed the distance between them. She wrapped her arms around Squall's arm as tightly as possible, laying her head on his back as she continued to sob.

"Please, Squall, we can make this work…I love you."

"Leave."

A/N: ERRORS AND TYPOS AND BAD GRAMMAR GALORE, I KNOW, I am soooooo sorry, I need a proofreader or something ...or maybe I should make a rough draft before sitting down for 3-4 hours writing it one time, not going over it, and posting it. Once again, super sorry, IT'S REALLY LATE. I'm sorry if this chapter sucked. It's really late and I haven't written in so long. REVIEW PLEASE…thanks. Next Chapter is coming soon, hopefully.


	10. Satisfied With Your Best

I don't own Final Fantasy VIII

I don't own Final Fantasy VIII

Chicken or the Egg

Chapter 9

Satisfied With Your Best

With all the force he could muster, Zell shot his hand out, sending the large debris that was made as he crashed through the cafeteria table flying a few feet through the air. His face felt completely numb and upon rubbing his hand over it, trying to regain his senses, noticed it was bleeding profusely. He wasn't sure where the blood was coming from, but he could feel it running down his face and taste it in his mouth.

Letting out a huge moan of pain, Zell rolled over onto his stomach, looking around at the room. He managed to crawl, using his elbows to push his body as his legs felt completely beyond repair, a few feet over to the closest body. He grabbed the closest thing he could reach, the bottom end of a khaki trench coat, and pulled on it fiercely.

"Irvine…Irvine…man, you alright?"

No response from his fallen comrade had Zell's entire body trembling in fear. Instinctively, he pulled on Irvine's coat with all of his force, actually dragging Irvine's body across the floor a few inches.

"Irvine…Irvine…Hey!"

Zell let out a huge sigh as Irvine replied with a deep moan that echoed off the hard cement floor his face was lying against. Slowly, Irvine managed to roll over, lying completely still and flat on the floor as he let deep breaths fill his lungs with air.

"Fuck, Zell, …what the hell happened…what's wrong with Squall?"

Zell tried to raise his body up by putting doing a motion similar to a push-up. Quickly, his arms gave out and he fell back down to the cold floor with a thud. Zell scrunched his face up in disgust as he swallowed spit and tasted blood.

"…Man, I don't know what the hell…just…"

Within the same instant, Zell and Irvine's mind fell on their fellow friends who suffered the same fate as them, both of them snapping their heads around the room. Zell pointed at a figure that he noticed lying, motionless, only a few feet away from both of them.

"Oh fuck, Quistis!"

Irvine glanced over, and then returned his head so he was staring up at one of the ceiling fans that spun slowly from the ceiling, pounding the bottom of his fists into the group with force again and again.

Still lying on his stomach, Zell covered his face with both of his hands, sobbing into the ground, refusing to look any more at the blank stare of Quistis as the pool of blood around her head continued to grow.

"…Ahhh fuck! …Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck…ahhh!!"

Coughing caught both Zell and Irvine's attention as they looked over to the opposite end of the cafeteria. Maneuvering her way through countless debris and bodies, Rinoa came towards them with Selphie's hands thrown around her neck, holding on for support, as blood seeped through her shirt at a rapid pace. As they got closer, Irvine and Zell noticed Selphie was coughing up considerable amounts of blood.

As softly as possible, Rinoa laid Selphie's body down to the ground, Selphie grabbing onto her arm with all the force she had left in her body. Rinoa spoke to Selphie, her voice almost commanding Selphie in a serious tone as Rinoa grabbing the side of Selphie's face trying to get her attention as her body started to go into shock and her eyes froze, looking up blankly at the ceiling.

"It's okay, it's okay Selphie…you're going to be okay!"

As Zell and Irvine watched before their eyes as Rinoa's sorceress powers started healing Selphie's possibly fatal, if unattended wounds, they tried their best to lighten the mood. Irvine looked at Zell, nodding his head towards Rinoa.

"…He didn't touch Rinoa…"

--

Tears rolled down Squall's face uncontrollably as Seifer turned around to face him, giving his best impersonation of a television commentator as a maniacal smirk filled out his face.

"Today…on Hours of Our Lives…Rinoa calls an important, emotional lunch with her closest friends as she tells them about Squall's cheating ways."

Squall only threw his head back against the wall, pushing his eyes shut so hard in frustration that the moisture around the corners formed together, making more tears, as Seifer continued his sick taunt.

"Enraged, Squall ambushes the luncheon, reveals the truth about Rinoa, and appears crazy as he mercilessly…fucks ups all his friends, of course leaving Rinoa relatively unscathed, and even manages to kill one former instructor!"

Seifer exposed all of his teeth in a full-blown smile as he pointed towards Squall, whipping his head back, and allowed his hands to drop down to his hips as he peered at Squall.

"Now, don't tell me…that wouldn't make one fucking kick ass sitcom!"

--

Any normal man would have been bed-ridden for weeks after the beating Squall took, unable to do any strenuous activities without succumbing to massive amounts of pain. However, this was Squall Leonhart, and he was literally sprinting, pushing his badly damaged body to its limit, as he glanced behind him.

_We should have never came back here…we should have stayed mobile …fuck!_

Looking behind him, he once again saw Galbadia Garden, which he had escaped, well, actually been released from, only minutes before. He didn't know how Seifer got Galbadia Garden under his control again, and truthfully, he didn't have time to wonder. The only thing he could think about was Rinoa, as he continued to sprint along the sole road that led from Balamb, where Galbadia Garden was docked at, to the former position of Balamb Garden, when it was stationary, that it was currently residing at.

Seifer's statement, as they threw Squall's mangled body out the front gate of Galbadia Garden like a bag of trash, was simple. Blocking out the pain that flowed through his body, Squall didn't have the willpower to also block out Seifer's final words to him that continually haunted his mind.

"**You have…two hours Squall. Two hours before this Garden, fully prepared for battle, … loaded to capacity with SeeD and Galbadian soldiers, …crashes into you Garden, not ready for battle and severely overmatched, destroying whatever is left in you life that is worth something to you. …Better run…"**

Truthfully, it wasn't a first time for Squall; he had to run this road at least once a semester when he was a student at Garden for his physical test. He knew that a one-way trip from Garden to Balamb, or from Balamb to Garden, took about an hour and a half, his personal best time being an hour and seventeen minutes. Unfortunately, that was when Squall was well rested, not bleeding internally and severely injured.

He kept the pace he needed to be at, if he was to have any time to warn Rinoa and the others, but he wasn't even halfway there yet, Galbadia Garden and Balamb finally out of view, and he felt like he already ran for hours.

The physically pain was almost bearable in comparison to the emotional pain. First off, Squall was a SeeD and used to having his body being broken and battered. Also, he never allowed himself to become attached to anything in the past, when he was a lone wolf. For the first time since he met Rinoa, as he felt all the emotional pain he had in his brain and heart, along with all of Rinoa's thanks to their bond, he wished that he was the old Squall and cared about nothing.

_Please Rinoa, hold on…I'm coming…don't let your pain and emotions take over…_

Squall felt Rinoa's pain as she attempted to save Quistis, and found out she was already too late. He felt her pain as she witnessed students, who's only crime was wanting to get some lunch in the wrong place at the wrong time, get pronounced dead by Dr. Kadowaski. He felt her pain as she remembered what the fake Squall had said to her, all of the things that made her feel alone and that her knight, boyfriend, and love of her life had abandoned her. He felt countless things, to many to describe, and it became exponentially harder for Squall with each step and each emotion he felt travel between Rinoa and him. All the while, Rinoa thought that he was actually responsible for all of this.

_Rinoa…I'm on my way…I'll find you and everything will be okay…I'll explain everything…if …you… …let…_

Squall immediately stopped running, throwing his lead leg for his next stride into the ground so hard that his ankle actually buckled slightly. He stood there, quickly glancing towards Balamb, then towards Garden, over and over again. Squall grabbed his forehead with both hands, clenching his teeth, as he began to breathe heavily and unevenly, on the verge on hyperventilating.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck! Shit, I can't…I …fuck!! If I go back and you see me your going to feel betrayed, maybe think I have come back to finish you off! Fuck!! These emotions you feel…I feel…are overwhelming …and that's not even with me confronting you when you think I did all of this!! I can't imagine the emotions that will conjure up…how likely it is you might fall…I might fail…_

Squall fell to his knees, hands still on his forehead, lost in thought and not sure what he should do.

_I can't not face you though…if I do that I'm allowing you to get ambushed and killed because you don't know…AHHH, FUCK!! If I do get you to understand…we still have to prepare for their attack, it's a losing battle…is Quistis really dead?! …I know you'll believe me …right Rin! We love each other, you have to believe me, you know I wouldn't do—AHHH FUCK!!_

Squall refused to think any further, standing back up on his feet and throwing his hands out to his sides as he slowly spun around in a circle, weighing his options.

…_I have to try…_

Doing his best to block out everything: physical pain, emotional pain, thoughts, and worries, Squall sprinted towards Garden.

--

Rinoa leaned forward in the cushioned office chair, emotional distraught, as she allowed her tears to fall down into her lap. She tried her best to listen to Cid but she had just lost a good friend and the most important thing in her life in the same morning. She felt betrayed, angry, upset, ready to give up, and many other emotions, some of which she didn't even know why she felt and she wondered if they belonged to her, were Squall's, or were coming from deep inside of her.

"Nothing will change, darling, I promise you that. I don't know what's happening with Squall, I can only speculate, but I give you my word Rinoa, we will find out! This is not easy for any of us, especially you, I'm sorry."

Rinoa raised her head, nodding slightly, about to speak, when Nida rushed into Headmaster Cid's office. Immediately, he stood at attention and saluted Cid.

"Sir, we got Squall on our cameras!"

Rinoa jumped out of her seat, both Cid and her exclaiming, "What?!"

"Yes, he is less than a minute from the front gate, running full speed, …he seems injured…badly, sir."

Cid stuck his hand out towards Rinoa, as if to say "Hold on," and began to pace and speak at the same time.

"Something…is not right…not at all! I can't put my…Rinoa! Wait!"

Cid's screams were in vain as Rinoa ran towards the elevator, towards Squall, not sure what she was thinking, feeling, or going to do. As she felt the elevator begin to sink down through its shaft, fear and uncertainty sank to the pit of her stomach.

--

Not sure of how much time he had left, but knowing he was running out, Squall surprised even himself, hurdling the entrance gates to Garden, scaring the old man who worked them and causing him to almost fall out of his seat. Sprinting, Squall quickly approached the directory, stopping to finally fill his lungs with air as he took in the sight before him.

Dr. Kadowaski, along with her two helpers, were spread on both sides of the commons area, kneeling besides what seemed like almost a dozen body bags, each filled with what Squall knew were students that his doppelganger slaughtered without mercy. Squall recognized the two men and one woman that were kneeling beside the body bag to the far left, closest of all of the body bags to the infirmary. The three figures were Zell, Irvine, and Selphie, Irvine had his back towards Squall, Zell and Selphie were facing him and were both noticeably crying.

"Ahhh…no…no…no…!"

Squall's outburst was loud enough that he gained the attention of everyone in the commons area, all three of his comrades standing up. Instantly, Zell ran around Selphie, about to charge Squall with closed fist.

"You son of a bitch, do you see what you've done?! Do you see what you've done to Quistis!! You…motherfucker!!"

Zell was breathing heavily, wounds still apparent all over his body; curative magic could only do so much. Squall held out his hand towards Zell, Selphie, and Irvine, all three about to charge and attack their SeeD commander.

"Wait, listen! I need to find Rinoa, please, where is she?!"

Zell took another step towards Squall, screaming at the top of his lungs.

"Fuck you Squall, you're not hurting anyone else!!"

Squall held out both hands, begging Zell with body language to hear him out as he stayed his ground. His voice held a hypnotic tone, genuine sadness and despair causing his voice to tremble.

"I swear Zell, I didn't do this! I know it sounds impossible but this is all Ultimecia's doing, through Seifer! That thing, that did all of this, looked like me, sounded like me, but it wasn't me!! You have to believe me right now Seifer, that clone of me, and half of the Galbadian military are preparing an attack on Garden right now-"

Squall's tone had Irvine and Selphie believing him fully, both of their hearts beginning to race as they listened to Squall. However, Zell, the hothead of the bunch, refused to listen to Squall and, with betrayal still fresh in his heart, assumed everything Squall said was a lie.

"You lie, you motherfucker!!"

"Zell, I swear I'm not…"

Everyone in the commons area froze as the elevator doors opened and Rinoa ran out, stopping at the top of the steps. Squall stepped forward with both of his hands still out.

"Rinoa…"

Rinoa didn't respond but they met eyes. Squall couldn't explain the feeling, it was as if he was explaining everything to Rinoa just by opening his heart up to her, no words were needed. All of a sudden, as if he was having a nightmare, Squall began to feel as if something horrible was about to happen, something that he couldn't stop.

The face Rinoa gave Squall haunted him; she was fighting, and losing, to what dwelled within her. Squall called out to Rinoa through their bond, hoping he could somehow find her, somewhere, in herself and help her fight Ultimecia. He poured every emotion of affection, every memory he cherished that they had together, and all the hopes, dreams, and aspirations he had for her and himself.

_Rinoa…I love you…_

**_Squall…I'll always love you…_**

With the most sincere look on her face, with tears running down the corners of her cheeks, Rinoa mouthed words towards Squall.

"I'm…sorry…"

_Rinoa…no…no!!_

In the same instant, Squall stepped away from Rinoa and the directories glass shattered, fragments raining down on Squall, Zell, Irvine, and Selphie. Squall once again shook back the feeling of déjà vu, as his worst nightmare came to be reality. Veins darkened, eyes fogged over, and finally the tearing of flesh was heard as her wings ripped out from her back.

Squall lowered his head, allowing his own tears to slide down his face as the beautiful white feathers began to peel of her back and fall in piles behind her. Squall looked up, once again looking at Rinoa, this time meeting eyes with only darkness.

_Rinoa…I'm so sorry…I failed you…_

_**This time…I won't miss your heart…**_

Squall kept his eyes locked with the sorceress before him, looking through Ultimecia and finding the part of Rinoa that still remained. Squall refused to move, standing there with his hands casually to his side, not even attempting to draw his gunblade, as Ultimecia walked gracefully down the elevator stairs towards him.

Like in their first confrontation, only this time in a different body, Ultimecia raised her hand and flattened her palm, allowing her fingers to curl up towards the ceiling. As the bright blue light began to crystallize, forming a giant projectile that Squall knew from first hand experience cut easily through human flesh, he still stood his ground, even when Ultimecia stopped about 20 feet in front of him.

_Don't do it Rinoa…you can beat her…I know you…_

Ultimecia began to snap her wrist in an attempt to start the chain reaction that led to a Blizzaga spell being flung at her target at a blazing speed, but halfway through she faltered as lost focus. Her facial expression changed from stoic to infuriated as Squall managed to smirk at this.

_You see…I knew you could do it Rin…I always knew you could…_

Surprising Squall, Ultimecia flinched her neck, actually causing Squall to take a small step backwards, instinctively resting his hand on his gunblade trigger.

**Squall…I can't…I just can't…she's too strong…I can stalemate her for a little…but I can't beat her…you know what…you must do…**

_I…I won't Rinoa…you know I won't…I…I love you…_

Ultimecia took a sluggish step forward, regaining focus as the Blizzaga spell she held continued to grow.

_**Squall…I love you more than anything in the world…but you have too…you have too!**_

Squall showed Rinoa and Ultimecia a genuine smile, but shook his head. Tears began to streak down Ultimecia's face as she took another, more controlled, step towards him.

_You can do it…you have too because…I won't…_

**_Squall it's so hard…I don't…think I can do it…Please just try…I'll be satisfied with your best…_**

Squall raised his head, closed his eyes, and held his hands up to his sides.

**_I am!! …_**

Squall took in a huge breath of air through his mouth and allowed it to flow through his nose in a giant exhale. Squall let a full smile cross his face, as for the first time in his entire life he felt completely comfortable and willing to trust his life in the hands of someone else.

_**… … Squall…I love you…**_

Fearing nothing, Squall opened his eyes, looking directly into Ultimecia's as her magic pierced the entire left side of his chest, going right through him and shattering off the wall of the main entrance behind Squall. As Squall closed his eyes, allowing his world to go dark, one coherent thought crossed his mind before his body fell lifeless to the floor.

_…More than the world…_

_--_

_Hyne, no! …How? …what happened to you Rin…what happened to your knight…to me?_

Many thoughts plagued Squall Lionheart's mind as he collapsed to the barren ground below him. Especially the visions that plagued his mind of what he saw hours before.

_That was my ring…that was griever…_

He remembered as he fought the feelings of tiredness fight against him, the information he had received on Ultimecia from Laguna. There wasn't much actually but there was a hypothesis on why she turned and let the evil inside of her take over…why she had fallen. Probably about 10 facts, 90 fiction, Squall thought to himself. However, he refused to deny it anymore as he realized the truth. Someway or another, Ultimecia's knight had betrayed her or failed her (which is the same as betraying her he thought to himself) letting her fall to the dark powers within. He had failed her, he had failed Rinoa…and on that fateful day in the past…or future…Rinoa died in a sense and Ultimecia was born.

_That was griever Rinoa…that was you too, huh? O hyne no this is all wrong!_

He knew from the classes on sorceresses he had taken in Garden about the extreme importance of a knight. They always loved one another, as they were the two most important people in each other lives. Sometimes there was romance, sometimes they were in love, sometimes they loved one another but were merely close friends. Regardless, the constant was the undeniable bond they shared that left they physically, emotionally, and mentally dependant on one another. The sorceress always was more dependent on the knight, as he was the only thing keeping her from giving into her dark powers. When and if a sorceress fail, it was almost mostly because of her knight failing or betraying her. Sometimes it would be willingly as the knight no longer wished to wish his life for her, or found someone else that he loved. Sometimes it would be unwillingly, such as dying protecting her in battle. Basically, if the sorceress lost her knight she lost her love and would usually lose her will to live and to fight off the evil within her.

_I failed you Rin…I'm so sorry. What did I do…die in battle for you or did I cheat on you …did I give up on you? No! _Squall reprimanded himself for that statement. _I would never do that… I would never hurt you…I would give my life for you…ya I must have died in battle for you…but how…_

He couldn't stop the tears, as he had held them back for years and they refused to yield to him any longer, not that he any longer cared.

_Will I ever get to see your beautiful face again Rin? Will I ever get to hear your beautiful voice again? Will I ever get tell you how I feel? _

Squall's thoughts were momentarily interrupted by the waves of overwhelming tiredness running through his weakened form of a body. He knew that he was probably going to die in this place. He knew he probably was never going to see her again…as he slowly let the tiredness take over his body.

_Rin…I promise…I won't fail you again. No matter what I won't fail you. I won't let you fail…again I promise. I…love…you Rinoa…I love you_

Then he heard her voice.


End file.
